Letters of Tomorrow
by kakashidiot
Summary: SEQUEL to Letters of Yesterday. KakaSaku. Kakashi's POV. Nine-tails and ANBU! RandR!
1. Crossing the Line

**Title: Letters of Tomorrow**

**Warnings: Mystery, Drama, Kakashi Gaiden Fillers, eventually, Violence**

**Disclaimer: I do not own this original piece of work, neither do I gain financially from it~**

**Author's Notes: **Spring Edit 2011

**Answers to Reviews on the bottom! Thanks for the encouragement! It looks like this fiction at least will be finished! Gentle Lesson is being updated as well!**

**I did this on request! I hope people enjoy this. It turned out to be less letters (sweat-drops) and more dialogue... at any rate... enjoy!**

* * *

**Letters of Tomorrow: The Sequel**

**Chapter 1: Crossing the Line**

_The life I've left behind me  
Is a cold room  
I've crossed the last line  
From where I can't return  
Where every step I took in faith  
Betrayed me  
And led me from my home_

- Sarah Mclachlan

_Time and memory - those two things are so deeply entwined. This I know from my heart. Something deeply written into my dreams - those memories that spring anew. It's almost frightening to close my eyes, for who knows what lies behind the door of the past?_

_Time and memory - for so long, I thought them inevitable, implacable - the twin faces of fate. But, you see, fate is kind. Two-sided, it holds hands with hope._

_And hope is the bright green eyes of a pink-haired girl._

_**Hello, my name's Sakura.**_

"My name's Sakura!" She said, with a bright smile - and she blushed and stammered through her self-introduction. Her eyes always sliding to her right as she checked out her crush, the silent Uchiha genius.

_But I know another part of her - she could never guess..._

_**I'm an Academy student - studying to become a ninja. Sometimes it's really fun but sometimes it gets boring, especially when sensei blabs on and on about work and stuff like that.**_

_**I'm 12 years old and I have pink hair and green eyes. I like... well... that's not really any of your business... but there's this one boy I'm crazy about - but he's way too cool for me - I don't know what to do! WAAHHH! How do I get his attention when baka-Ino is in my way?**_

_**Seriously? How about you? What are your hobbies? Do you have any? What are your favourite classes? My least favourite is botany class we girls have to take - picking and arranging flowers - and the teacher is soo... ugh... boring... I wish I was a boy - well... no... because then... HE wouldn't like me anymore...**_

_**I hope this is all I have to write... maybe something will happen next time so I'll have something interesting to say. It's really hard to write a letter to somebody on the spur of the moment.**_

_**Yours sincerely, Sakura.**_

* * *

"You actually got a pen pal, brat?" sneered an older student - a thirteen year old who never seemed to pass the Academy's final exam.

Four-year-old Kakashi raised his eyes to look at his fellow pupil coolly.

"Yes."

"You actually know your kanji? Or does Mama have to help you?"

The temperature dropped visibly in the room - as Kakashi began to plot several death blows he could deliver to his impudent bully. It wasn't looking too good for the Hatake genius. With Sensei out of the room due to an emergency with another kid (who'd cracked his wrist during kunai practice), the class, who were supposed to be using the twenty minutes for study time, had long ago given up to play around.

Several of them, agreeing with the older student, snickered as the bigger boy loomed over the seated white-haired "new" kid.

It wasn't himself he was worried about - so much as the fact he'd get in trouble for laying the loud-mouth out. He could just hear his sensei.

_"Hatake! Detention!"_

_And his father..._

_"Eheheheheh... that's Kakashi for you! But... um... you might wanna... keep it down, ya know?"_

So Kakashi turned away and focused on his kanji practice. A punishment from Sensei who had told him that his handwriting looked atrocious.

It made him nervous just thinking about it. His letter. Would the person figure out who he was? She seemed nice. And cool. And a little... girly. But nice. She didn't seem like the type to beat up on him - not like his classmate kunoichi who always laughed at him behind his back and called him "little kid".

_So I'm four. Get over it. Just because I'm here doesn't mean I'm weird. Does it?_

It worried him...

The hubbub around him died down really quick. It was Sensei. Who, looking around the chaotic mess and his screaming kids, began to lay out detentions left, right and centre

_I'm SO glad I didn't do anything_, sighed Kakashi. _Sensei's been really uptight lately... It's not a good idea to push his buttons right now at the moment..._

* * *

_**Dear X**_**, **Kakashi read slowly, trying to figure out the pretty kanji.

It was his pen pal, Sakura. She had already replied to his first letter! His heart skipped a beat just at the thought of some pretty chick rushing around to write him a letter.

_Or not_, he sighed. _Once she finds out... she'll laugh herself sick..._

Turning his thoughts away from such depressing subjects, he focused instead on the scroll in front of him.

_**That's just wrong. I have to call you something else. Give yourself a nickname or something... seriously... it's weirding me out. Besides... are you a guy or a girl? I need to know this because I don't think you want to know girly girl stuff - if you're a boy.**_

_**I'm sorry that you have no friends. I hope you're not in my class because I don't think people should ever be left out - well, there are some times that I wish Ino-pig wasn't so annoying - but still... sometimes, when I see how good all the other students are, I feel lonely. I feel left out. I wonder: "What am I even doing here?" Do you ever have that feeling? Well... I work hard at what I can - I am top of the class for chakra control and ninja know-how. Not like this other idiot boy in class. Geez. He's scary...**_

_Wow... _Kakashi sniffed. _She's so cool! She knows how I feel! She knows what it's like to be the lonely one!_

_**But sometimes... he's good for laugh.**_

_**You're the youngest in your class? Wow... how'd you figure that out? Everybody is my age or thereabouts... I think. It's too bad people talk about you - nobody talks about me, much... except maybe Ino.**_

The small, grey-haired boy was so engrossed in his letter, he didn't notice his father and his guest peek in.

"What's the kid doing?"

"Dunno... Wait here..."

He opened the door and stepped in - as silent as a top ninja can be.

"Yo, Kakashi! Whatcha doing?"

Three kunai flew past his ears as Kakashi (nearly frightened to death) crouched there, glaring at his immature father.

"What're you hiding?" blinked Hatake Sakumo, pensively eyeing the kunai now buried deep into the wall behind him. "Not town secrets, I hope!" He laughed.

A hand snatched the scroll and flicked it open with ease.

"Lessee..."

"Jiraiya-sama!" Kakashi's respect for the Sannin and deep resentment warred in his voice of protest and appeal. "That's - that's -" He blushed. "Private!"

"Oh-ho-ho!" The white-haired ninja smirked. "A love letter, then? Apple not falling far from the tree, eh, Saku-chan!"

"A love letter? Already? But he's so young!" wailed his father, in a melodramatic voice.

Kakashi rolled his eyes.

Jiraiya closely perused the neat kanji.

"Hmmm... _'but still... sometimes, when I see how good all the other students are, I feel lonely. I feel left out. I wonder: "What am I even doing here?" Do you ever have that feeling?' _What the hell..."

"Hey... hey... no - swear- eh, what WAS that about? Kakashi? Who's this?"

"It's Sakura-chan. She's my pen pal," Kakashi said, now clearly sulking.

"A what?" Sakumo asked, looking over his best friend's shoulder.

"Pen pal," Kakashi growled. "A - writing exercise our sensei set up."

"Well... that certainly is novel," Jiraiya-sama grinned. "Wish we had something like that when we were young!"

"Hmmmm..." Sakumo nodded, absently handing the letter back to Kakashi. "Hanako and I used to write - during our courtship when we were separated." The white-haired Special Jounin sighed. "But now we can't even write..."

There was a heavy silence at that. Kakashi, unsure of what to say, wished letter-writing hadn't been brought up.

_I guess it's just one more taboo thing I gotta be careful of... _Kakashi sighed. _With Jiraiya-sama around, Father's gotten better... but... when he leaves... It's so hard when Father gets so sad. I wish Mom were here to make him happy. She told me to take care of him but..._

When Kakashi looked up, he noticed Jiraiya was pushing his father out the door - laughing about getting a drink to celebrate life.

_But..._

_Jiraiya-sama's eyes aren't laughing..._

Kakashi wondered.

_Perhaps even Tsuande-sama and Jiraiya-sama worry..._

Turning away, Kakashi finished the letter and smiled.

_With Father out of the way, I can start on an answer tonight._

Setting up his desk carefully, with the ink pot close enough for his short arms to reach, Kakashi began his answer.

_**Dear Sakura... It's nice hearing from you...**_

An hour later, he sat back, cricking his neck and stretching his arms. It was amazing to Kakashi how much he found to talk about. Time had flown by so fast - unnoticed, as he had excitedly scrawled the kanji lopsidedly across the scroll. But the letter had finally come to an end and Kakashi hesitated.

_My real name is out. 'X' is weird... how about... oh! I know! Pen pal!_

He paused, then added a postscript.

_**Is that okay?**_

* * *

Two weeks passed before an answer came. Kakashi spent the time studying, waiting, cooking, reading, waiting, keeping an eye on his father... waiting...

It felt odd - to have something to look forward to. Int hose days which seemed to crawl by - the road of life hidden and uncertain, Kakashi found some excitement in the waiting. A nice change from dull routine of practice and chores.

"Kakashi-kun..." His father drawled as Kakashi checked the mail (yet again). "It's not going to come any faster, despite your enthusiasm..."

His young son blushed - but a part of him felt happy - at least his father seemed more cheerful lately. Enough to make dry jokes anyway.

_Or perhaps..._ Kakashi thought dourly, eyeing the bottle at his dad's elbow. _It's the sake talking_...

"Kashi-chhhaaaaannnnn's in looo-vvvveeee!"

_Yep. It's the sake..._

"Hm... well... I'm just worried..."

"Kakashi..." His dad murmured. "You can never -"

"What?"

"Never mind."

_**Dear Pen Pal,**_

_**I still find your name to be boring, but that's okay I guess.**_

Kakashi's eyes drooped.

_What does this girl want?_

He read on.

_**I'm sorry your family life is screwed up.**_

_Screwed up? I don't remember saying that..._

Kakashi paused to look at his dad finishing up the bottle.

_Well... pathetic maybe..._

_**Perhaps you should find a friend. I can't say who'd be able to know what you're going through, but you should find somebody that will listen to you to help you release your stress...**_

_Hn. As if anyone wants to be a brat's friend. I'm uncool... I guess... it's pathetic, huh. To know that - it's really all up to you, Sakura-chan... You're all I got._

_**Let me tell you, popularity is over-rated.**_

_So says a cool girl..._

_**And it does seem to me that you get attention, too. Okay... it's negative... kind of like this moron in class who is totally laughable. He just screws up in the most weird way... **_

Kakashi winced.

_Did she just compare me to a moron?_

_Errrr..._

He read on, sweat-dropping at her enthusiastic description of the boy she was crushing on.

_Ew. That's just wrong... I'm NEVER gonna crush like that..._

"Sure you will, Kakashi-kun," his dad drawled.

Kakashi jumped.

_Damn. I forgot to read it ALONE... wait... did I just say that last bit out loud?_

"Who's she in love with?"

_**...he's Uchiha...**_

"He's an Uchiha."

"Uchiha? At the Academy?" Sakumo blinked. "I don't remember hearing about anyone trying out -"

"Odd..." Kakashi agreed. "Maybe in another of the classes?"

"Maybe she's lying to you."

"No," Kakashi shook his head with conviction. "She'd never lie to me. Ever."

"Ohhh?"

Sakumo watched his son run off to finish his letter in private. The white-haired Jounin smiled and then heaved a deep sigh.

_Maybe it's seeing him like this - worried... trying to hide his worry. Working so hard to make us happy - to make us proud - to bring some glory back to our dying clan... It's pathetic. Hanako. I'm missing you so much - after two years, I'm still pathetically... pathetic... but our son... you would be so proud!_

Said son was in his room smiling over Sakura's chatter about genjutsu.

_Wow... I got a smart genjutsu girl as a pen pal! Cool! Although - liking an Uchiha - depressing. There's no way I could compete... but she's nice..._

* * *

It was raining when Sakumo left - Kakashi watching him run off into the misty darkness, wondering if this was okay. More than ever he wished he was more grownup so that he'd be like Raido and go off on missions with his dad.

_That'd be so cool._

But this mission was ultra-special - something only an S-class level Jounin could complete. And since Jiraiya-sama was away, Tsunade-hime, busy and Orochimaru off doing his own thing, the renown Hatake had been enlisted for the job.

It was so important, even his dad couldn't talk about the details.

A part of Kakashi was worried - but a part of him was excited.

_After Jiraiya-sama left, Father got so depressed - but now... this seems to excite him. Maybe this was all that he needed - something to challenge him... still... I hope it'll be okay..._

That night, Kakashi comforted himself by writing a short note to Sakura.

_**My Dad's gone away on a long mission again - I'm kinda worried...**_

Several days later, her reply in the mail, eased his worry - his father hadn't returned yet - but, Sakura seemed cheerful.

_**I'm sure your dad will be fine - if he remembers what's waiting for him - if you wait for him... he'll come back! I'm sure!**_

_Her world is so bright... I wish I could be there where she is..._

* * *

Kakashi found the Kage on the roof of his office - looking up at the three faces carved out of the mountain.

"It's been almost a week now," Kakashi said stiffly after bowing politely. "I wondered if you have heard news of my father?"

"It's going to be okay, Kakashi-kun," the greying Sandaime smiled, his pipe wagging in the air.

Kakashi watched the smoke drift upward.

"I'm uneasy - is there something going on that we aren't to know about?" The young Hatake pressed the older man - polite, nervous - and determined.

"Ohhhh... so you've noticed?"

"There's a lot of Jounin and Chuunin missing."

"Hm. You're very observation, young Hatake. Scary. Just like your father!"

"I'm trying," Kakashi said, his eyes fastened on the smoke wafting away in the wind...

_Why do I think of candles?_

"I see there is no lying to you, Kakashi-kun." The Kage sighed. "If you promise -"  
"I promise!"

"If you promise, I'll tell you something secret..."

"I promise on the honour of the Hatake."

"Hahaha! So serious, Kakashi-kun! You need to smile more."

Kakashi said nothing.

"Ahhh... and you're probably wondering when this old man will stop blathering and start getting to the point! Well, your father and a whole bunch of others have gone to the borders - a reconnaissance mission, that might end up as a full out battle... there is war marching on us, young Hatake - and your father - as well as the Sannin, will be needed. I hoped to keep the younglings out of this - but I see that you already are noticing... Hmmm..."

"So you have had news?"

"The answer will be in tonight," the Kage smiled. "We all are wishing for the best."

Kakashi nodded briefly.

"Thank you. I'm sorry for bothering you."

"It's no problem, Kakashi. Keep safe! And find someone to play with - the time will pass quicker when you stop thinking about waiting."

Kakashi blinked and jumped away.

Tsunade landed on the railing beside her sensei, brown eyes sharp with worry.

"Scary," Tsunade shook her head. "That brat is -"

"Lonely, I think," the Hokage sighed. "And there's not much I can do about it. I hope Sakumo can get back soon. He's need here."

"Sakumo has his own problems," Tsunade sighed. "Hanako never saw herself as important - but she was the pillar of the Hatake heart... and when she left..."

Melancholy silence fell on the pair.

It is said that no news is worse than bad news... but news came and for Kakashi it brought even more pressures. That his father had made a wrong decision was embarrassing - that it cost lives was even worse. Graduation suddenly loomed over the small boy - and honour depended on it so much more.

Sakura also seemed worried - Kakashi found himself giving her a lot of tips for the day of the exam.

If he passed - if she passed - they'd be Genin. They'd be moving forward in their dreams.

_Dreams._

_What dream do I have? _Kakashi thought, one night as he sat on the porch, looking out over the gardens and the empty yard and long walkway. _What dream can I have other than bringing honour back to our dead clan. There's only father __and me - and father..._

He didn't turn around - he knew where his father was.

Passed out on the parlour futon.

Kakashi's fist clenched, crumpling the scroll in his small hand. The kanji -

_**You seem really confident - you're not scared one bit?**_

There was no space for doubt. No chance for fear. There was only duty - knowing that you HAD to do it. No chance for failure. Only certainty.

He wrote back a short note - glossing over his father's depression and the recent pressures at school. The bullies who thought that it was cool to pick on the small Hatake brat, who thought he was all that.

_What do I say to her? What CAN I say? Sakura... perhaps... this is the truth..._

_**I can't afford to be scared... If I pass, I'll be the youngest Genin in Konoha history ever! And my Dad will smile again and people won't look at my family like they're dirt anymore!**_

Exam day came and went - for Kakashi, it was uneventful. The big event was two days later, when Sakura's letter came in the mail.

_**Dear Scarecrow,**_

_**I PASSED! I hope you did too! It's soo cool thinking that maybe one day we'll meet as grown up shinobi! I'm sure you'll pass! You can't help but pass - you're so smart!**_

It made Kakashi smile. _Somebody_ was excited.

_Somebody... believes in me..._

"What're you doing?" sighed Sakumo passing by Kakashi's bedroom and peering in at his young son who was setting out an ink pot.

"Writing," Kakashi turned around to smile. "Sakura-chan passed! I wanted to tell her I passed too - with top marks!"

"Oh. I see. So..." Sakumo sat down on Kakashi's neatly turned down bed. "You had top marks! That's my boy!"

Kakashi blushed.

"I just wanted -"

"I know." Sakumo's voice sounded muffled.

Kakashi turned around. His father had laid down, face turned away.

"Father."

"I'm sorry that it all depends on you... but... you see... Kakashi... you're really our last hope. I KNOW you can be what the Hatake need - I'm - just -"

Kakashi found a space on the small bed, trying to wrap his small arms around his father's neck, while the older man wept.

_Mother..._

When Kakashi wrote his letter to Sakura, it seemed that the whole joy of passing seemed to have died. No doubt dampened by reality. That passing wasn't the only answer to everything.

_This is only the start, _Kakashi told himself. _You've only JUST put your sandal to a long hard road... _He sighed_. I sound like an old man..._

_**Well...against all odds, I passed. I didn't think I would exactly... since my sensei doesn't like me that much and he thinks I'm too young to be in the Academy at all... and I think he kind of hates my dad too... because when my dad screwed up this mission... Sensei's son died... **_

_**It's kind of hard to admit this, but I nearly didn't take the test - but your encouragement spurred me on. You know how the parents come around to pick their kids up - after the test... well... Dad didn't show. Everybody kept staring at me so I slipped out as soon as I got my hitae ate from my sensei... I bet you had your parents there, right? But, hey, when he comes back home from the mission, I'm sure he'll proud of what I managed to do. The youngest Genin ever! **_

* * *

Sakura's letter was (as per usual), Kakashi's one spot of happiness in the following week. He read his letter out to his dad who'd taken to sitting a lot in his study, staring at the wall - or out the spacious windows - at the wild garden and the falling rain.

**Dear Scarecrow,**

**YAY! YOU PASSED! I'm glad you passed too! **

**I'm so happy! Well... not just because you passed but because my crush is on my team! Yep! Yep! He's MIIIINNNEEEE! But then... I guess nothing can be perfect - BECAUSE I'VE GOT THE CLASS IDIOT IN MY TEAM! WHY? WHY? WHY?**

"She's funny. It's weird how girls are when it comes to teams..."

"Hm. She's - what? - twelve years old. Just hitting puberty, so boys are important... a bad age to start in my opinion," Sakumo said. "Too soft and distracted for war..."

"Uhhh... I think... she's nice..." Kakashi defended his pen pal. "I think she's fun..."

"Hmmm... she's nice and fun, alright. I agree. But... fun and nice don't have a place on the battlefield, Kakashi. Girls like that are always the ones found on the sidelines, crying."

"Well... even if she is, I'll help her become strong!" Kakashi said firmly. "I won't give up on Sakura-chan just 'cause she's a weepy girl! I'm sure she could become strong!"

"Hmmm..." Sakumo stared at his son's determined face. "Suit yourself..."

**I'm sorry your Dad couldn't make it - or me... you should have told me - I would have come to cheer you on! And it's too bad about not getting a team right away. Geez... how old are you really? You said you were the youngest in your class - but how young are we talking here? Anyway. I'm glad I was encouraging - when you have people depending on you, you always do better, I think. I hope you get a nice sensei. Do you know who your sensei is yet? You should see ours! He's - Oh! Mom's calling me! Gotta go! **

"Yeah... she seems like she cares about you," Sakumo sighed. "Let's hope she's not a fair weather friend..."

"I don't see why you have to be so harsh about people," grumbled Kakashi.

There was a pause.

Sakumo looked even more depressed.

Kakashi looked horrified.

"Sorry!" They said at the same time.

Another uneasy pause.

"I'm sorry..." Sakumo finally sighed. "I'm just..."

"It's okay." Kakashi rose to his feet. "I should be leaving you to -"

Sakumo said nothing more.

But he watched Kakashi leave in the mirror, looking smaller than ever.

_He needs a sensei. Until then... I should... I should... get off my pathetic ass and do something for him... Hanako... _

Sakumo stood, wandered over to the shrine, opened the door, lit the candles and knelt - staring at her photograph. She was smiling gently, eyes, understanding... forgiving...

_Hanako..._

* * *

"He needs a sensei," Sakumo said sharply, ignoring the stares of the Hyuuga and others who had gathered outside the Kage's office.

That the Hatake had actually bestirred himself was amazing.

"Let him wait," sniffed a Jounin. "He's special. Maybe... but... not worth all this excitement. Hokage. Let the boy wait until he's at least ten... then a suitable team could be chosen for the Hatake."

"He needs one now!" Sakuma protested. "I don't want his abilities wasting away..."

"Abilities?" sniffed a Hyuuga. "There's no -"

Sakumo glared at the people congregating around the desk.

"I just want him to have some outside guidance - I've taught him all I could - but he needs -"

"Nothing. Just a time of rest until he's old enough," put in another Chuunin. "It's not like we have tons of people to spare anyway... not for one on one..."

"Hokage-sama," begged Sakumo.

"Don't worry, Sakumo," the Hokage smiled. "I just arranged it."

"WHAT?" everybody leaned in. "You got someone?"

"Wasting a Jounin on a kid during a really uncertain time," another Hyuuga muttered. "Scandalous..."

"Silence."

The Kage's stern voice caught everyone's attention. The room quieted.

"Jiraiya's back..."

"Oh?" Sakumo jerked up. "Really? Where?"  
"Here," smirked Jiraiya, from the doorway, appearing from nowhere. "Trying to keep your skinny ass from getting into trouble. Again."

"Heyyy..." Sakumo mock protested. "I don't need help -"  
"But you need a Jounin for young Kakashi. A sensei..."

"Yes..."

"We came back for the Jounin trials."

"Eh?"

"Are you so out of it, Saku-kuuun... Jounin trials. You know... where Jounins are elected..."

"Yeah..."

"Well... Minato has been chosen as a candidate. He'll pass and become your kid's sensei, no problem. You watch. In three weeks time, Kakashi will have a sensei!"

"Minato? Your apprentice!"

"HHHERRREEE!" A brilliant poof of smoke, light and leaves filled the room. "The FUTURE HOKAGE!"

"Ehhhhhhh..." Sakumo's eyebrow twitched. "The class idiot?"

"Hmmm... he'll be good for your son. A genius. Loner. But funnier. He'll help Kakashi-kun lighten up..."

"I see..."

"It'll be a chance for them to grow together. And Minato likes to have fun - but he's serious now."

"Yes!" Minato nodded. "I'm ready to be Jounin - and Sensei! I'm going to help Konoha grow. Where's young Kakashi-kun anyway? It's been so long since I've seen him! He was only a baby when I last saw him! Has he grown?"

"And then some..." Sakumo grinned wryly, his smile grew bigger, as his chest puffed out. "He just graduated the Academy - at the age of FOUR! Youngest ever!"

"We'll never hear the end of this," grumbled a passing Uchiha. "Seriously..."

"You should be proud," Minato said. "He must be very smart."

"And a hard worker," Jiraiya shook his head. "You'll have to show him how to have a good time."

"I'm proud of him," Sakumo agreed. "But... he needs more guidance. He's not reached his potential yet. I hope you can help push him on further. I don't want him resting on his laurels..."

Minato blinked.

"Ehhh... ummm... yeah..."

"At any rate, give us two weeks and we'll get back to you, okay?" Jiraiya waved a hand.

Sakumo nodded.

"Thank you, Jiraiya. I appreciate it. And, many thanks Sandaime, for suggesting it. And I look forward to hearing from you, Minato-kun. Kakashi and I will be waiting! Good luck on the exams!"

* * *

Two weeks later, Minato found himself at the large gates of the Hatake complex. It seemed so huge. For the blonde-haired, bouncy orphan, it seemed like one of those dream houses - like the Hyuuga and the Uchiha. The smells and sounds of the elderly servants and some distant Hatake family members pottering about. Passing the large, wild-looking garden, Minato couldn't help but shake his head.

_It's amazing. That such a small clan used to be so... big... I guess... that just goes to show that things come and go. What's important is that you followed your dream and your path - that you upheld your honour and your promises. In the end, clan names just don't matter. It's up to who can protect and who can't..._

"Minato-kun."

It was Sakumo, sitting on the front porch, dressed up for the occasion. Beside him sat Kakashi.

He had changed a lot No longer a small squalling baby with a tuft of white hair - no. He'd definitely grown. Into a little man. His mask, hitae ate (just so!), black gloves and stark black and white Hatake dress...

_Hm. His father's son after all._

Even the white bush was familiar - the way their hair defied gravity was amazing to Minato.

_Still... even though he's grown... he's so... small..._

_I bet they had to downsize his kunai and everything... I guess endurance and strength will have to be a big focus... taijutsu..._

Minato smiled at himself.

_Look at me. Already thinking like an adult... It's so exciting... but..._

Here he took another look at Kakashi's serious, dark eyes. Unreadable and worried.

_Kinda scary. But then, the kid looks worried..._

Minato smiled at his new student.

"Hello, Kakashi-kun. You probably don't remember me, but I used to hang around when you were just a baby. Those were the days... when Hanako used to bake cookies for me! Ahahahaha!"

The silence was deafening.

Then:

"I'm glad you have such fond memories of Kakashi and Hanako. I hope you can share those memories with Kakashi, right?"  
Here the clan head turned to his son, who nodded quickly.

But his small hands were clenched on his knee.

Sakumo sighed.

"Perhaps it would be best if you two were alone. I'm sure the eyes of a parent are dampers for one-on-one confidences..." The older man rose.

Minato bowed and smiled uncertainly.

"Kakashi, listen to your sensei at all times."

"Yes, Father."

"And Kakashi -"

Sakumo's voice stopped the young boy.

"Remember to have fun, okay?"

"Sure, Father."

"Your Father is nice," Minato said after a moments silence.

"Hm... yes."

"I feel bad. I didn't know that her memory was so fresh - that Hanako would make you so sad. I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

Kakashi shrugged.

Minato shook his head.

_It's like this all the time at that house?_

"No," his green eyes found Kakashi's dark ones. He knelt before the boy. "It's not okay. We should be honest - about what we like and don't like..."

"Uh..."

"Here... let's sit here and talk."

"Talk?"

"Yes. Get to know each other."

"Huh?"

Kakashi found a seat on the small stone steps, his sensei sat on the rail in front of him. They had found a quiet spot on the white arched promenade, the tree's behind them creaked comfortingly in the wind.

"Say... talk about dreams, hobbies... dislikes and likes... and such..."

"I -" Kakashi rolled his eyes. "Why don't you do it, Sensei? Show me what you mean."

"Okay. Fair enough. My name's Minato. I like ramen. I dislike having to wait those four minutes for the ramen to finish cooking... I also like reading. Cool books that Jiraiya-sama writes - very exciting..."

"You mean, porn?"

"It's NOT porn! It's classical -"

"Porn."

"Why - how do you know?"

"My dad collects stuff like that... sometimes... when he's in the mood..."

Kakashi was rather nonchalant about it.

"But I think it's kinda gross..."

"You'd think that..." Minato twitched. "At any rate... my dream is to become Hokage. And my hobbies are... reading..."

"Who would've guessed..."

"And - um... training."

Kakashi tried to look dutifully impressed. And failed.

"How about you, squirt."

"My NAME is Hatake Kakashi. I don't like talking to people about my likes and dislikes. As for my dream..." Kakashi thought hard. "I dunno... but... I have a few hobbies..."

Minato's eyebrow twitched.

"What kind of information is that. All I know is your name! You gotta give me something to go on..."

Kakashi just stared at his sandal.

"I dunno... I like miso soup... and writing letters to my pen pal I guess..."

"Well..." Minato sighed. "That's a start."

"You're not... mad?" asked Kakashi tentatively.

"No. Why would I be?"

"I dunno," the little boy shrugged.

"It's okay if you don't want to share things, Kakashi. I guess... when I'm excited about something, I like to tell people about it. I just want you to feel the same way."

Kakashi nodded slowly, his tense shoulders, relaxing.

Then, his eyes crinkled up into crescents.

"Okay."

Minato smiled back.

_Maybe things aren't so hopeless..._

* * *

Three weeks later, Sakura got a very excited letter.

_**Dear Sakura,**_

_**Sorry about the shortness. Things have been busy for me - I met my new sensei. He has blonde hair, green eyes and a wide smile. He is very nice and says I'm going to be a genius. Well... Dad says that all the time about me - but why doesn't he smile like Sensei?**_

_**Sensei has started training with me - serious training - and we've even done a bunch of C-ranks with me. He says that in no time I'll be ready for the Chuunin Exam. I don't know. But when Dad heard this, he said that it was possible.**_

_**What do you think?**_

The idea of going to the Chuunin Exam really pumped Kakashi up. It was another chance for him to shine and try out his strength. Minato sweat-dropped at the thought of sending such a small kid into a tough exam like that -

But from the determined look on Kakashi's face, it seemed like the boy was still very much goal-oriented.

_And no wonder... all that pressure on him. And his Father not helping anything but depending on him so much... There's not much I can do... but... prepare him..._

"Already running you into the ground, huh?" Jiraiya laughed, watching Minato pause mid-chew - mind obviously far away from his ramen (a sight to behold).

"Hmmm..."

"It's Sakumo, right?"

"Wellll..." Minato didn't know what to say. "I think that family has a lot riding on Kakashi. Too much. He's only four. Going on five... but... the Chuunin Exam... I'd like to think of it further in the future than Kakashi sees it..."

"Yes. Well. Make a compromise. After he turns five. He can take the Spring exam. And prepare him for Akagahara - you've been through it - you can give him all the tips he needs."

"It's the one on ones I'm afraid of," Minato shook his head. "As a five year old... his reach is way too short..."

"He can do it. He just has to be smarter than they are. And play on their underestimations."

"I guess."

"Keep sounding him out... that's what's important. And make sure he's having fun."

"Yeah. I'll try to dissuade him out of the whole Chuunin thing."

_**Dear Scarecrow,**_

_**What can I say about my sensei? **_

_**He's... weird... I guess... For one thing - time has no meaning for him. Yes. He's LATE ALL THE TIME! DAMMIT! Can't he take us seriously! We had to wait TWO hours before he showed up for the first time! Everyone had already met their sensei and gone off to get acquainted - it was embarrassing to just sit there.**_

_**Anyway, Sensei comes in - and gets hit on the head by a chalk eraser - I kind thought it was funny. It was Naruto's idea... NOT MINE! But still... kinda funny... **_

_Wow... she's got one pathetic sensei... isn't he taking his job seriously?_

_**And it serves Sensei right, ne? His excuses for being late are disgusting too. Like before his "Bell Test", he came late - 5 HOURS! And what was his excuse? "A black cat crossed my path so -"**_

_**WHAT THE HELL? **_

_Poor Sakura-chan! He sounds so irresponsible! Doesn't he know that punctuality and rules are there for a reason?_

_**But you know... I thought he was dumb - but he's a Jounin for real. We couldn't even touch him - and we passed his test by the skin of teeth - kinda accidentally... sort of embarrassing to admit. Naruto, Sasuke and I managed to show real teamwork. I never knew it was that important. But you know, to Sensei it's important. He said that he had a friend on the Memorial Stone - which reminds him of that importance all the time...**_

_Sounds kinda fishy to me..._

_**Anyway... back on topic... Sensei's got grey hair - and a mask - and likes to read these orange books that have a big red R on the back. I think it's a bad adult book - because he won't let us read it, but he laughs over it all the time.**_

_**I think he's a pervert. Maybe...**_

_What the... are all sensei perverted? What's with those porn books anyway? I hope Sakura-chan never looks in them! That would be horrible!_

_**But he's super strong and super cool. Well... enough about him - we're going on an important mission tomorrow to Wave Country - a guarding mission. Thanks to the class idiot - yep! Can you believe my luck? Him - of all people! - on my team! Well... so is the guy I like, I guess you can't win everything!**_

_**Back to this guarding mission - **_

_**My Uchiha says it's basically 'babysitting' but still... it's a C-rank... Naruto says it'll be a piece of cake... Anyway, we'll be gone several weeks, so don't worry if you don't hear from me for a while.**_

_**Good luck with training,**_

_**Sakura.**_

_**p.s. I'm proud of you being so enthusiastic about training and stuff - but maybe you want to wait a bit before going into the Chuunin Exam. I mean, don't you think being a kid is important too - as important as being accepted. Knowing your Dad might smile is a great goal to push towards - I'd do it too - but... please... be careful. I don't want you to get hurt.**_

_**p.p.s. How old are you? Give!**_

Kakashi reread the first postscript again.

_**I mean, don't you think being a kid is important too - as important as being accepted. Knowing your Dad might smile is a great goal to push towards - I'd do it too - but... please... be careful. I don't want you to get hurt.**_

_Sakura-chan... Is this what you live then? Joy in the moment? Huh... you probably don't even understand what you're saying... but... it's true. Maybe that's what Minato-sensei... maybe..._

"Kakashi..."

_Maybe... I should enjoy myself with Sensei for a while... Enjoying the now... finding a dream..._

"Kakashi? Where are you? Oh!"

It was his Father.

Minato stood behind him, peering past him at his young student, who was rolling up a scroll quickly.

"Oh. You're reading another one of those letters. Sorry, Minato-kun. Seems like my young son is already crushing on his pen pal.."

Kakashi blushed.

"I'm not!"

"Heh heh heh... boy after my heart," Sakumo smiled.

"That he is!" Minato said cheerfully, happy to see Kakashi and his father both happier. "A pen pal? Is she hot?"

"AND smart!" Kakashi added.

"Hot and smart. You're lucky! Know her name?"

"Sakura."

"Aha... well now... that's nice, isn't it? Cherry blossoms - such a pretty name."

"Hm... Can we go now?" Kakashi switched the subject after stowing the letter away in a small chest.

"Okay. Let's get to training! We've got a lot to do today!"

As they walked away, Minato couldn't help but laugh.

"That's the pen pal you mentioned on the day we met?"

"Yeah?"

"You've been writing to her for long?"

"For about a year and a half, I guess... she... she makes me feel nice inside. She's my friend. Really! And she never says I'm dorky or anything!"

"Wow... that's nice."

"Yeah... and you know... she helped me decide... about, the, well, uh, the Chuunin Exam."

"Oh?"

Minato stopped.

"I want to wait."

"OH?" Minato mentally gave the pen pal a thumbs up. "Why?"

"I think I should take more time to train... to enjoy myself... until I'm really sure... so... I'm gonna wait until I'm at least five and half..."

The young kid sounded so matter of fact.

"That'll give me enough time to train AND relax."

"Good idea," Minato grinned. "I like that girl of yours. Got a good head on her shoulders. If you ever want to hook up with a chick - that's the one for you! Seems like she's got your best interest in mind, huh?"

"Yeah..."

* * *

That night, Kakashi took the time to write Sakura a quick note - unsure if it would get to her in time before she left on the "babysitting mission" - but he just had to. He was that excited - now that the pressure and worry was gone. He could focus on himself now. And do things he'd always wanted.

And Sensei had said a mission was coming up, which he managed to snag.

Even Father had smiled and said 'okay'.

It was the best day of his life.

All thanks to her and her advice. Her letters which had made him so happy - on those nights when he'd felt so alone in the big, empty mansion. Those words which had even made his dad chuckle...

_**Anyway, you probably won't hear from me in a while. I'm sorry! I'll miss you! Still... let's keep in touch every so often, huh?**_

_**Until next time,**_

_**Scarecrow**_

And he meant every word.

Minato was right.

_Sakura-chan was the girl for him!_

* * *

**READ AND REVIEW!**

_**Next up: Kakashi's Chuunin days... Mystery of Sakura. (i think not sure what this is going to entail...)**_


	2. Betrayal of the Heart

**Title: Letters of Tomorrow**

**Warnings: Mystery, Drama, Kakashi Gaiden Fillers, eventually, Violence**

**Disclaimer: I do not own this original piece of work, neither do I gain financially from it~**

**Author's Notes: **Spring Edit 2011

**Answers to Reviews on the bottom! Thanks for the encouragement! It looks like this fiction at least will be finished! Gentle Lesson is being updated as well!**

_**TO ALL MY REVIEWERS WHO SOOOOOOOO KINDLY REVIEWED! ARIGATOU!**_

_**AND TO ALL FUTURE REVIEWERS - THANK YOU FOR TAKING THE TIME!**_

**THIS IS a SEQUEL. A SEQUEL TO THE COMPLETED "LETTERS OF YESTERDAY"! IF YOU'VE NOT READ IT YET, TURN AROUND AND FIND IT, READ IT FIRST, THEN COME BACK FOR MORE! hahaha! It'll all make sense for you then!**

* * *

**Letters of Tomorrow**

**Chapter 2: Betrayal of the Heart**

_Where every step I took in faith  
Betrayed me  
And led me from my home_

- Sarah Mclachlan

"It's that time of year!"

Sensei stretched lazily and grinned another dazzling smile at his young protege.

_It's that time of year._

_That time of year -_

_That time -_

_Time..._

* * *

I wake from my light doze at the sound of Sasuke and Naruto approaching. Lap number 8 out of 10. I bend down leisurely, calmly -

As if I had been alert all along.

As if... I hadn't been woolgathering about Sensei again.

They pass by, giving me twin glares, I can only chuckle... and, at the sight of a frazzled Sakura staggering past, sweat-drop. I watch her small back and sigh.

_It's that time of year. The Chuunin Examinations... It's that time of year, Sensei. Again - _

Waking - sleeping - dreaming - living - there is only one constant in the ever changing flow of life. The hands of the clock as it moves around the circle. Inexorable... but then - there is us - and our memories.

Those memories that echo and resonate. A part of us forever. But...

_It's odd. How time works. _

_How one's memories... one's being is at the mercy of a pen._

* * *

_**Dear Scarecrow, **_

_**How's it going? I know, I know... you've been really busy lately with all that intensive training of yours... but still... so many exciting things are happening! It's that time of year – you know – the Spring Chuunin Exams! Hahaha! I'm not going to be in it, but still... we couldn't help but bump into some people from Sand who are participating.**_

_**THEY ARE WEIRD!**_

_**And scary! I don't feel very strong when I see how cool they are! **_

_**Of course, the boy I like (still not telling! Ha!) is able to stand up to them... but that's genius for you!**_

_**How about you? Are you going into the Chuunin Exams after all? I hope you don't get hurt! I'd miss my favourite pen pal!**_

_**Yours ever,**_

_**Sakura.**_

_**p.s. I just had a horrible thought? What if my baka-sensei nominates us for the Chuunin Exam? I don't think I'd be able to do it! But I don't want my teammates to go ahead of me... and – they don't think I can do it, either! I'm hopeless!**_

* * *

"It's that time of year!"

"Yes," Kakashi nodded, watching a trio of guest Genin pass by them overhead.

"But your decision to wait for the Fall Examinations is a wise one," Minato smiled down.

"Oh?"

"First, mucking about in mud isn't my idea of fun for you. Secondly -"

"That shouldn't matter to the shinobi..."

"SECONDLY, I've got us a mission to work on."

"Cool."

"Thirdly, I think you need more time to sharpen your ninjutsu. How about learning some higher level jutsu while we're on the mission? What do you think of that? Perhaps... a fire jutsu, like Katon?"

"REALLY?" Kakashi perked up immediately.

Minato sighed.

_What a kid. Apathetic about everything in life, but say the word 'jutsu' and he's like a dog begging for snacks..._

"Sure," the blonde Jounin laughed, ruffling his student's wild bush even more - making it stick out in ALL directions (no real improvement).

"Stop that," Kakashi blushed. "I'm not a little kid any more."

"Ohhhh?" Minato chuckled. "You're - what?"

"I'm FIVE -"

An expectant pause.

"In 4 months, 2 weeks and 1 day," Kakashi reluctantly finished.

Minato sweat-dropped.

_Uhhh... 'kay..._

"Which brings me to my fourth point," the Jounin hurried on. "You'll have grown a bit more by then -"

"That's right!" Kakashi nodded.

"We hope -"

Kakashi glared.

"I WILL!"

"Yeah... you go work on that, shortie."

"Don't call me 'shortie', Seennnssseeeiii!" wailed Kakashi in embarassment.

* * *

Watching his student relaxing, laughing, blushing, Minato's heart swelled with happiness.

_He's gone through dark times, just like the rest of us. And wars marching. And his father is... _

Minato smiled fondly.

_He's quite the kid..._

"Sensei?" Kakashi leaned forward. "Sensei. You okay? I'm sorry for being disrespectful... it's - URGH!"

Suddenly surrounded by strong arms, the small grey-haired Hatake found himself almost suffocated with the pressure of the hug.

"You're so cute! It's heartbreaking!" wailed Minato, theatrically.

"Sen-seeeiii..." croaked the five-year-old, his voice muffled in his sensei's vest. "Can't. Breathe!"

"So small and adorable!"

"Se-en-se-ei-"

"AH! BEHOLD! FATHER! IT'S MY ETERNAL RIVAL WHO I MET THE OTHER DAY AT THE PARK!"

Kakashi and Minato froze.

"AHHHH! SUCH DEVOTION BETWEEN SENSEI AND STUDENT!" Agreed Maito Senior. "THAT'S THE RIGHT FRIEND FOR MY GAI!"

Kakashi pried himself from Minato's frozen (read: horrified) grip.

"!" he darted off.

"AH! ETERNAL RIVAL KAKASHI! IT WAS MY TURN TO PICK THE RULES! BUT - I CAN BE GENEROUS - IT'S A RACE THEN!"

Watching the small green spandex suit-clad child bolt off into the distance after Kakashi (who was now a mere cloud of smoke on the horizon), Minato, finding the torture of two Maito reduced to one, found some life in his limbs.

"Maito-san," he smiled politely. "It's great seeing you here. You are training with Gai on this fine day?"

"AHAHAHAHAA!" Maito Senior chinged his teeth. "INDEED! GENIUS AS EXPECTED OF JIRAIYA-SAMA'S STUDENT! "

_No... not really that unexpected of freaks like the Maito... _

Minato's thoughts were interrupted by Maito-san's exclamation: "AND YOU ARE ALSO ENJOYING THE SPRING TIME OF YOUTH AS YOU TRAIN WITH HATAKE-KUN AS WELL?"

Minato edged away.

"Errr... yes..."

"Gai has not yet attempted the Academy Test..." Maito's joking attitude disappeared, as he stared off at the second cloud, which had collided with the first cloud of dust in the far distance. "But... ever since he met young Hatake..."

He smiled and chinged his teeth.

Minato froze again.

"Thanks to Hatake-kun, our Gai has improved many times over!"

"Well... that's nice..." Minato smiled.

"Hatake-sama... he's..." Maito sighed. "I went to visit him the other day - to return some esoteric nanchuks... and he's..."

Minato's eyes slid away at the image of the morose clan head - once famous as White Fang.

_Still famous_, he reminded himself. _Whatever he is today..._

"He told me Kakashi is going for the Chuunin Exam this year... not now, I hope." The Maito clan head looked concerned.

Minato shook his head.

"Oh. Good."

"He's going this fall... soon after his 5th birthday..."

"NOOO WAAAYYY!" Maito Senior looked shocked. "But then... that's the Hatake for you. Over achievers... But... our duel is not over yet... oh no, Sakumo. The Maito WILL prevail!"

The two men looked up as Lee (with a struggling Kakashi in tow).

"SO, DID YOU WIN, GAI?"

"YEEESSSS! I BEAT THE KAKASHI! I BEAT KAKASHI!"

"... yay..."

Kakashi rolled his eyes.

"He won?" Minato asked. "Good for you, Gai-kun!"

"I LET him win," Kakashi said stoicly. "I don't want to be around the freak any more than I have to."

Gai's eyes filled up with tears.

Minato tried to look shocked.

"Kakashi! Apologize! You can't call people freaks!"

"... sorry..." Kakashi mumbled, shuffling his feet in shame.

"You - you - didn't take it seriously!" Gai whimpered. "Why didn't you race faster?"

"Now, now, Gai," Maito said comfortingly. "It's most likely Hatake-kun's off day -

"Eh?" Kakashi frowned. "It's not -"

Minato's grip on his student's neck tightened.

Kakashi shut up.

"BUT YOU MUST REMEMBER WHAT YOU DID YESTERDAY!"

"YES! THAT'S RIGHT! YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT I DID YESTERDAY!"

"No... I can't guess..." Kakashi sighed.

"I BROKE A NEW RECORD..."

"... No way..."

"I SKIPPED ROPE 500 times with 10 pounds of weight on my legs!"

Minato and Kakashi: ...

"IMPRESSIVE, HUH?" Maito-san smiled.

"Uhhh... nice..."

Walking away from the two enthusiastic taijutsu fighters, Minato and Kakashi didn't know what to say. After a moment, Kakashi sighed.

"Skipping rope 500 times with 10 pounds of in leg weights... as if anybody should do anything so stupid..."

"Oh... I don't know..." Minato stroked his chin. "It's giving me ideas... But that's for another time. I want an early evening - responsibility calls..."

"Responsibility?" Kakashi looked suspicious. "It's a girl, more like."

Minato blushed.

"H-h-how did you know?"

"You have that LOOK in your eye. You're gonna be spending your whole night tonight flirting with some girl. Geez. And you're a grownup! A great ninja! A student of Jiraiya-sama the Sannin - and you have no sense of seriousness... geez. When I'm gonna be sensei - IF I'm ever sensei, I'm gonna totally be kick ass and I'm gonna be serious."

"You'll bore your students to death that way."

"No. I'd be responsible with the lives of my men under me."

Minato shrugged.

"I'm serious. You just haven't had the chance to see it yet. You see, Kakashi - what do we fight for?"

"Peace."

"What what do we use peace for? To sit around and be 'serious' and responsible? We are responsible and we fight _because_ we want to enjoy life and let others - those we protect - live the lives they are meant to have as well."

Kakashi blinked.

"You have a point."

"Of course I do. I'm your Sensei. Have some respect, kiddo. Besides," Minato blushed. "Grownups like to flirt with girls you know. Even your Father was a player when he was young. Seriously. Jiraiya-sama told me that."

Kakashi fell silent.

* * *

When he got home that evening, tired and aching, Kakashi made a quick dinner of leftover eggplant soup for his father and him. It wasn't much - he knew it wouldn't be eaten. But as usual, in ritual - in routine - as if life was going on in that frozen home - Kakashi laid the silver and the dishes out on his father's favorite dinner table. Set it by the study and, knocking gently on the door, slid it open after a moments pause.

It was rather dark in there. At first, he couldn't see his father - but he was there - as usual. In front of the shrine, praying. Yet again.

"Your supper is ready," his young, uncertain voice broke the dead silence.

But his father didn't stir.

Kakashi watched the faint smoke drift upwards from the still candles.

When he shut the door, they flickered.

* * *

Rereading Sakura's letter, Kakashi could only shake his head.

_It's kinda sad. That she is so unsure of herself. She is such a great person. All she needs is for someone to recognize her potential. And there's probably tons of guys around her telling her that she's really nice. How could she not be nice? And where's her Sensei? Isn't he cluing in that she's not sure of herself? Geez..._

He took his time replying to her. Trying to be encouraging, as next door, his father found oblivion in his prayers to the unseeing dead.

* * *

_**Dear Sakura, **_

_**You're so cute when you write this way! You seem so excited about life. For me, it seems to drag by slowly... It's really boring when you're alone by yourself all the time! I'm glad you're here to talk about your adventures...**_

_**Sensei says we have to enjoy ALL of life. Deep thought, huh... Right now, Sensei is flirting with some girls at an inn... **_

_**Well... I'm glad you got teammates who are there to protect you – but you know, as you get older (and stronger), I'm sure that you're going to protect others too. You, Sakura, will stand in front of them and show your back! I'm sure you will! **_

_**As for me, I'm going. Not now, of course. Sensei's on an important mission - so I'll be probably going to the Autumn Exam. But whether I'll actually get past the first round, I'm not sure... We'll see. **_

_**This means I'm going to be super busy. I hope to write sometime... but it's probably not going to be soon!**_

_**Good luck!**_

_**Scarecrow**_

_**p.s. Sorry about not being able to go and see you... I'm sure you'll be fine! Just know that I'm cheering you on from far away!**_

* * *

A month and a half later, Kakashi returned to find another letter from Sakura sitting on his desk. Looking around the large, dark, grey room, Kakashi sighed.

Alot had changed. Here and there, furniture had been hidden under large white sheets. And more than half the household staff was gone.

"I'd been thinking on it for some time," Sakumo had explained to Kakashi matter-of-factly. "It's really useless for us to have so much staff when we can take care of ourselves so easily."

Kakashi smiled and nodded woodenly.

_Things are getting harder around here. With Father hardly taking on missions anymore, things are gonna get tight I guess. But then... there are my missions and ... It'll be lonely here..._

Kakashi left his father in peace - to find a nook in the garden. Laying back against the grass, looking up at the swiftly darkening sky, Kakashi couldn't help but sigh with content. It was good to be home - to be there, where his mother was last. Sometimes, he would creep into her little parlour, where she had liked to sit and weave, while watching her small private garden bloom in peace. All the flowers planted with her special loving care.

And there was the swing.

He was too old to swing, he told Gai.

But that one was his favourite. Sitting there on the wide seat, hands clasped, he could just re-imagine his mother, laughing, pulling him onto his lap - and Father looking with mock outrage at the young intruder who had so rudely - so innocently interrupted a kiss.

It wasn't so much the cooking and the cleaning - Kakashi had learned how to do that long ago.

No. It was the silence. Silences which said so much - but there was no one to say them. People who had locked away their feelings and shoved them deep down - beyond memory. Those were the silences that grated on you. Sucked energy from you.

Out here, in the garden, there was the sleepy chirps of the birds in the trees. The 'pok' of the bamboo hitting the stone. And the gentle gurgle of water.

Out here, things were living on, full of memory. In there... there was only the smell of musty locked rooms - of death...

* * *

_**Dear Scarecrow, **_

_**You were right. Even though I didn't pass through the rounds as far as I hoped, you know what? I learned stuff anyway. To be honest, even though you encouraged me alot, I didn't feel confident at the sight of all those Genin in the hallways... but your words helped me go through with it -**_

_Wow. She says I helped her. I can hardly wait to tell Sensei that I'm a teacher already! Ha! And probably a better one than him!_

_**Well, even the boy I like told me that my genjutsu know-how was amazing!**_

_He's so lucky to have her on his team. He probably doesn't know that. The bastard._

_**But of course, not everything went well... the Chuunin exam was hard – and there were crazy people participating in it... and all of my schoolmates, too. But not everyone did well... **_

_That's life..._

_**At one point, I had to protect my teammate's from this really evil guy who turned out to be some really important ninja in disguise! And what's worse – yes, it gets worse – in the final part of the exam, we were caught up in that big battle! You couldn't have missed it! It was horrible!**_

_**I got knocked out by a really evil Sand nin!**_

_That bastard! If I was there, I would've protected you, Sakura-chan! But then, her sensei should have warned her about stuff like that... Didn't he even tell them what to expect? What an irresponsible idiot..._

_**Isn't that a crazy exam? It ended up with – oh! I gotta go! My mom's calling me to run an errand – and I need to visit this really weird big eyebrow kid who saved me – he's in the hospital with some pretty bad injuries.**_

_Sounds like Gai... but can't be..._

* * *

The letter was as he expected. It made him smile.

_She hadn't passed - but... she was so happy. And it seemed like her idiot schoolmate had impacted her a lot. Still... she's done well. All things considering. I bet her parents are so proud of her. They better be. Sensei says that protecting your friends is the best thing a ninja can do. And the fact that she took that step... but... are all Exams that crazy? Will mine be horrible too? I hope I pass..._

_Father will be happier. Sensei would be proud. And I'd be able to tell that freak - er... that weird kid that' I'm cooler than he is..._

_Father will be happier..._

Snuggling under his bed covers, Kakashi wondered. And doubted.

* * *

"It's that time of year!"

Sensei tossed the small white Chuunin Exam entrance scroll over to Kakashi.

"Sign it, if you want to join."

Kakashi nodded.

"I'll get on that right away."

Minato sighed.

"You don't have to rush it. Think it over. You just turned FIVE. You could get killed in Akagahara - and I'll not be there to save you."

"Well then..." Kakashi shrugged. "It's do or die. It doesn't matter anyway, either way."

Scratching his head as he watched his (still) short student walk away - determination in the small stride, Minato, for once, had nothing to say. There was nothing he could say to the young boy.

He could say -

Kakashi.

You don't have to do this.

You don't have to prove anything.

You know that this is useless -

Your father -

He's -

As an orphan, Minato could only imagine what it felt like to feed and care for a living corpse day after day.

With the memories of a brighter past - and the knowledge of a dark tomorrow...

He sighed.

_Jiraiya-sama... where are you when I need you?_

* * *

"As your sensei, I can't tell you too much of what to expect," sighed Minato, before letting Kakashi enter the room. "Just... be ready for the unexpected. Look underneath the underneath. Remember - what seems like the end - isn't necessarily what it seems like. And remember - keep low - and -"

"Sensei... I'm gonna be late -"

"And make sure you are careful about endurance and stamina. Your strength lies in speed and flexibility. Okay?"

"Right," Kakashi nodded.

"Seriously. LOOK before you leap, or step or jump or anything -"

"Right." Kakashi looked bored. "You said that five times already."

"I just - I don't want to hurt the only precious thing that Hatake-sama has. The one thing that he entrusted me with - his most important thing..." Minato's hands tightened on Kakashi's small shoulders.

Kakashi looked away, freezing up at his father's name.

"Father... I don't think he sees me any more... Even if I went and never came back -"

"Don't."

Kakashi stiffened at his Sensei's suddenly harsh voice.

"Don't. Ever say that. You hear me?"

Kakashi nodded.

"There are people out there who need you. Gai. Me. Konoha. Even your penpal chick needs you. You wanna break a lady's heart?"

Kakashi nodded slowly.

"I forgot..."

"Don't. This is what this test is about. Gaining the ability to protect - showing your ability to protect the ones who love you most. Don't ever forget that."

"Right, Sensei."

"Alright. Go knock 'em dead, Kakashi."

Minato ruffled Kakashi's hair.

Kakashi opened the door and slipped in.

He didn't complain about his now thoroughly messy hair. Feeling that hand on his head - if he shut his eyes - he could pretend it was Father.

* * *

The room fell silent at the entrance of the newest (and youngest and shortest) examinee. Nins at the far back couldn't see the young Genin at all - just knew someone had come in by the opening and shutting of the door.

"Who is it?" muttered a Sand nin with a guffaw. "Konoha sends their babies to mock us?"

Kakashi glared in the direction of his voice.

But the small outfit, complete with mask and bushy hair only made him look cuter - no matter how insulted he looked.

"No way. It's Hatake-kun!" Raido bent down. "Aren't you... kinda small for this?"

Kakashi glared some more.

A Rock Nin - twenty by the looks of it, and then some - elbowed his way to the front of the stunned crowd.

"Hey, aren't you kids a little to young for this? Go home and hug your kiddie blankets!"

The room murmured with approval.

Even some of the older Leaf nins looked cross.

"Just goes to show you connections DO matter -"

"I'd be pissing my pants."

"Ha! No worries. The written test alone will kill them."

"They're still wearing diapers -"

"What?" Kakashi and Raido yelled back, voices shrill with indignation. "We're big kids now!"

A pause.

Glancing at each other, they blushed.

"You're a big kid!" Kakashi snorted. "You're only like - what... eight?"

"Nine, Hatake. Nine. Like you should talk, Chibi-kun!"

"I'm growing!"

"Oooo! Watch me quaver with fear!" Raido smiled - then laughed.

Kakashi's eyes curved up, realizing the ridiculousness of the whole thing.

"Anybody else we know?" Raido wondered.

Kakashi looked around.

"As long as HE'S not around, it's okay."

"Who?"

"Maito Gai." Kakashi shuddered.

"You make that sound... horrible..."

"Because he is."

"Now, now. That's not nice."

"He's a freak - who won't leave me alone. You'd change your tune if he kept on following you around -"

"Now. That's not nice. Seriously... Oh! Look who's here! Genma! You're late!"

Kakashi sweat-dropped.

"More idiots?"

"Hey! It's the Hatake Baby Genius!" Genma waved lazily, a stir stick jutting out from his mouth as usual.

"Genma. Be nice... We don't want to scare him."

"I'm not scared," Kakashi said stoutly.

"Good." A cool, but sweet voice spoke, silencing the entire room with its authority. "This trial is not for the faint of heart."

Kakashi turned and looked waayyy up - and glared.

"But I see this one is feisty. Let's not waste any more time then, shall we get to the paperwork, so to speak?"

And thus the most surprising Chuunin Test started.

* * *

"Kakashi," Genma said seriously. "I think we should stick together. What do you think?"

The three boys had grouped together nervously on the edge of the looming forest.

"Uh. That's a good idea," Raido nodded. "I know this is supposed to be more individual - but Sensei told me that teamwork is important."

"So did mine." Genma mused. "You think they get instructions to say the same thing - or do you think they believe that for real?"

"Probably a bit of both..."

"Well... we should take it easy," Genma stretched. "It's our first time, by no means our last so -"

Kakashi stalked off.

"What's his problem?" groaned Genma, walking after the short youngster.

"I think he wants to take this seriously... He wants to pass -"

Genma's face paled. "No way..."

"What WERE you going to do anyway?"

"Just scout around and see how things are laid out - so then I'd get somewhere the next time I do it..."

"Uhhh..."

"Hey! Kakashi! Get back here! We decided to be a team!"

Kakashi turned around.

"The longer I stand around you, the more I feel like my brain is going soft with the stupidity you spout."

"Oooohhhh - Baby Boy knows big words -"

"Unlike SOME people," the Hatake said testily. "Now excuse me, I have a destination in mind already..."

"We have to look for a field of clover..." Raido recalled the rough map the teacher had set up. "And then... have..."

"To get a scroll from the station."

"And there's a limited amount of scrolls - so - if you don't mind... I'm in a rush," Kakashi jumped away.

"He's got issues," grumped Genma, his stir stick quirking madly up and down.

"You've got issues, not taking this seriously," countered Kakashi. "Why are you following me?"

"We're a team."

"Uh -"

"Didn't your sensei tell you how important teamwork is?" Raido asked.

"Uh... yeah... but this is entirely -"

"No it isn't... I think we should help each other. That way we can get further quicker..."

"Okay. But only if you take this more seriously."

Genma sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Sure."

* * *

It was tough for the three young boys - one, five, the other two seven and nine - to survive in the woods for three whole days. Genma for one never seemed to understand the seriousness of the whole thing. People were dying here - for a chance to become Chuunin for their village. Kakashi could only shake his head at the older boy's antics.

But as the first day ended, the boys had already settled into a routine. Kakashi, being lighter, smaller and more agile, took to the trees - looking down and easily signalling to his two partners the dangers of the traps which littered the ground.

_Somebody had a field day setting these all up_, Kakashi thought sourly as he sprung (yet another) pit fall trap. They had struggled to bring down two brutes who had thought it would be funny to gang up on the "Konoha Baby Boys". Kakashi wondered what they felt like now - hogtied and beaten by the very same "Baby Boys".

_Well... people shouldn't underestimate the virtues of shadow clones or katon jutsu... Geez..._

_Not that they are any better -_

Kakashi glared down at his two companions who were now happily squabbling over some fish that Raido had caught for dinner.

* * *

"Now that was brutal," Genma sighed, as the three boys collapsed on the grass outside the Akagahara grounds. "I don't want to do that ever again. That place is so unsafe."

"And you think the battle field is going to be safer?" asked Kakashi.

"We're not going to be on a battlefield, dummy."

Kakashi said nothing.

Raido stared at him thoughtfully, then turned to Genma with a shrug.

"Well, joking aside," Raido smiled. "I think we did amazing all things considered. Now we just have to worry about the matches next month."

"'We'?" Genma blinked.

"Well... I meant... Kakashi and I..."

"You're an idiot - how could you lose your scroll so easily?" Kakashi snorted. "Being so careless... it's a good thing that you didn't go to the matches. You'd have been creamed - and been an embarrassment for Konoha."

"I don't care about what people think," Genma rolled his eyes. "It's about us and what we feel in our hearts. Are we having fun? Are we enjoying ourselves? Are we doing it out love?"

"Fun? Enjoyment?"

"C'mon Kakashi - don't tell me you didn't enjoy yourself in there - you and your cute Kage Bunshin..."

"I'm not cute - and yes... I did enjoy myself - I wouldn't be a ninja otherwise... but you don't seem to see that this is all about responsibility..."

"Sure I do."

"No, you don't."

"Yeah. I do."

"Nooo..."

"I do."

"Do not."

"Do."

"Do not."

"Do!"

"Since when."

Genma sighed.

"I lost my scroll when my backpack got cut off."

A pause.

"Then it was my fault..." Raido looked shocked. "You had to protect me - so - you -"

Genma shrugged.

"It doesn't matter."

Kakashi looked thoughtful.

"So you sacrificed the mission to save your friend? That's wrong. What if that was for real - and the scroll meant a hundred more lives."

"Raido's worth a hundred lives."

Kakashi looked horrified.

"You can't be a ninja."

Genma sat up frowning.

"You got a problem with sacrificing things for other people."

"No. I got a problem with people who don't finish their missions -"

"At the cost of their friend's lives and their own hearts?" Genma growled, irritated by Kakashi's know-it-all tone. "That's bullshit! Just cause I know the importance of teamwork doesn't mean I can't be a good nin. In fact, I'm gonna be a better nin than you! You watch!"

"Oh yeah, Mr. I'm-not-gonna-take-this-seriously. As if that will happen in your lifetime!"

"You watch! I will!"

"I'll be watching! You won't!"

Raido smiled as he watched the two bicker.

_This is how it should be..._

* * *

"I'm proud of you, Kakashi."

That's what his Sensei had said.

When Kakashi returned home, he found his father - where he had left him. Draped on the divan, unmoving and silent - watching the night creep over the now wild garden.

"I passed," Kakashi said, stiffly, his eyes trained on his fists - clenched on his knees.

He didn't say anything more.

And there was only silence to answer him.

* * *

It was silent when he came home that one cold day. Outside, the sky was a heavy grey and purple - and everything between the swollen clouds and the dirt was drenched in heavy rain. Rain that clung and soaked into every crevass of the body. Kakashi had given up the dream of dry feet and clothes a long time ago.

All he cared about was getting into the almost empty mansion and relaxing in a warm bath, drying off and then perhaps sitting down to write an answer to Sakura's letter. It had been a long time since he'd found some time like this to write. And there was Father to think of.

Perhaps some soup would do.

_And there's the left over bread..._

It was silent when he came home - but it wasn't the usual moody atmosphere. At first, Kakashi thought it was the rain. But then, he realized that everything was very dark - and that feeling in the air. Kakashi sighed.

_One of those days, huh..._

Two hours later, after he had dried off from the bath, and finished making dinner, he carefully placed the food on the tray - just so. The way Cook had taught him.

_"Your Papa deserves the best," she had said. "He's a great man."_

_"A great man?" He had asked her, black eyes wide._

_"Hmmm... and you know what, Hatake-kun?"_

_"Eh, no... tell me!"_

_"You're gonna grow up to be as great as your Papa, right?"_

_"Yes, yes!"_

She was gone now. With the others. They were all gone.

_It was just him - and Father -_

"Father. I brought dinner."

He waited a couple of seconds as usual. The routine now down pat. Something done in hope.

He opened the sliding door silently and slowly - teacup and saucer ready in hand. It fell, broke and splashed over the small rug, now stained with blood.

There was nothing. It looked so familiar - and yet - so not true.

_This can't be happening. Father! Father! No!_

Running over to cradle the hunched body curved around the short blade still buried deep in the man's gut, Kakashi's fear and pain welled up in his throat, suffocating him. He could hardly breath. He was seeing dots.

All he could do was cry.

And nobody heard him - as he sat there in shock, blood soaking his clothes and hands.

Trying to make sense of it all.

Shifiting through memories. That morning... his Father had seemed... fine... and then, memory flooded back to Kakashi - his favorite blade had broken earlier that afternoon.

_So... it's. just. me._

_It's. Just. Me Now..._

His sensei found him there the next morning, lying exhausted from tears. When he picked up the small limp body, Minato felt the sorrow deeply. Pushing the silky grey strands away from the tear streaked face, he sighed gustily.

"Kakashi..."

"Sen-sei..." The young boy's short arms crept around the man's neck, as a short sob forced its way out of the slim body.

"Let's go," Minato said, his face hard. "We'll leave this for others to care for."

"Why?" The high thin voice wondered - as if in a daze... broken.

_Why..._

"Now... I'm... all alone. I miss him so."

"It's okay," Minato whispered, tears running down his face freely as he carried the small boy out of the house. "You can cry. It's okay."

"No. It's not okay."

Kakashi never cried again.

He was silent.

_**Dear Scarecrow, **_

_**You haven't written for a long time. Are you okay? Did your Chuunin exam go okay? I'm sorry... I wasn't able to attend because of a medic mission... but.. I'm sure you passed...**_

_**Is everything fine? I hope everything's okay for you! Seriously! I hope you aren't hurt!**_

_Sakura... She's... she..._

_**Please drop a line – even if it's short! I need to know! I miss your letters!**_

_**Yours, Sakura**_

_**p.s. You're right! I'm going to become a medic! Thanks for your guidance!**_

_Sensei was right_, Kakashi thought. _He was right. The reason I'm here... maybe it's for her... _

With that encouraging thought, Kakashi pulled out his favorite pen and ink pot and sat down to write. He ignored the sun pouring weakly through the window, the loud bangs above him - someone was trying to repair the apartment buildings old plumbing, he guessed. Focussing on the letter and his news, trying even two months later... it was hard to sort it all out.

To say he felt loss didn't cover the anger and the shame. And the new fire of determination.

_**Dear Sakura. **_

_**I'm sorry I didn't write for so long. Things have been crazy. My dad died.**_

_**No. That's a lie, really. The bastard – how can I call him dad? - he killed himself. I don't know what to say...**_

_**I'm too small – too young for him to leave me like this. My sensei is in shock too. He says I must stay with him – but I don't really want to because his eyes are just like everybody else – full of pity.**_

_**I can just see them saying... 'poor little boy'... I hate that. And some people laugh at me – and say that I'm going to turn out just like my dad. I feel pathetic. I don't want them to see my face and see him – so I'm thinking of getting a mask. What do you think?**_

_**As for living... well... I can't stay in the mansion, so could you send the letters to this new address? That'd be great. It's an apartment I chose for myself. It's in a quiet part of town, which I think is great.**_

_**Well... I gotta go... **_

_**Yrs. Scarecrow**_

_**p.s. Please don't tell anyone about my dad... It's kinda hush-hush. Only the higher ups talk about it. Thanks!**_

_**p.p.s. I'm sorry again for not writing sooner. It's been really busy here, packing everything up in the mansion...**_

I'm gonna be the Hatake everybody wants to see. Not the loser who couldn't even be responsible. Sure he was... Kakashi flinched at the memory of his father grinning, white hair blowing in the breeze. White Fang... but... ultimately, he was weak - and now - where is he? Where he always wanted to be, I think. And it's not here - with me.

Kakashi looked around his small room with a jaundiced eye. A one bedroom apartment with a small tabletop stove for cooking small amounts. It would do. It wasn't fancy - but it wasn't empty and haunting like the house and gardens of the Hatake garden. It had been so easy to turn his back on the whole estate. There was a few things he would miss.

The gardens - his mother's private garden with the soothing 'pok' of bamboo. And the swing. All those happy memories.

Kakashi sighed, threw himself onto the bed and fell into an uneasy sleep.

In his dreams, Sakura laughed at him.

Within the week, he got an answer. Opening it up, Kakashi couldn't help but feel a little happy to hear from her - and then felt guilty. How could he be so content - when his Father was barely in the grave?

_Easy_, that dark side of him smirked. _He was a loser. _

Kakashi shook his head and focussed on the letter.

_**Dear Scarecrow, **_

_**I'm sorry for making you feel bad. You shouldn't feel guilty. If I lost my dad, I'd be inconsolable for many months! The fact that you're already thinking for yourself and getting back onto your own two feet is amazing!**_

Sakura... Kakashi's eyes misted over with awe and admiration. You're too nice!

_**I think you're an example of determination to me!**_

_**I'm sorry about your loss – and you know what, if ever I meet you, I won't patronize you or pity you – because I know that you can take care of yourself and be a great ninja!**_

Well... we'll see about THAT...

_**You know... I can't laugh or take it lightly... I know how it feels to lose someone close to you. The boy I loved all these years left the village! He betrayed the village to join our enemy! I can't tell you how my heart felt – it was like it was ripped out of my body... but you know...**_

_**It only made me want to get stronger – so I can bring him back. Nothing else matters. That's why, when my team broke up, I understood that this was a chance for me to train even more! I'm getting special tutelage from Tsunade – the famous medic Sannin!**_

_Wow. She's so determined_. Kakashi slumped as he reread "bring him back". _I guess she really does love him alot_.

The small Hatake sighed.

_An Uchiha... how can I compete - with my age, height and... with HIM for a father... _

_**Have you heard of her?**_

_**My sensei went to her to ask her if I was a good candidate. You know... my sensei is weird, perverted, late – but sometimes, he does the coolest things for us...**_

_**Oh yeah... wear a mask... my sensei has one – and all the girls in the village think it's cute – although it's kinda annoying since he doesn't let us see under it... I think wearing a mask is cool – but – if you do... please let me see your face!**_

_Hmmm... her Sensei wears a mask too? Cool. And... kinda nice that she wants to... _

Kakashi sighed.

_Sakura-chan... I'm so glad you wrote!_

_**Anyway, I gotta go!**_

_**Ja ne,**_

_**Sakura**_

_**p.s. I hope you like the flowers – they're the first time I've done dried ones!**_

Kakashi stared at the small flowers which had come with the scroll. Flat and dry, they looked fragile and yet - so beautiful. Beautiful in their fragility.

Dried flowers. Kakashi stowed away the letters and the flowers carefully.

_Dried flowers._

When he went to sleep, he saw his mother laughing as she showed him how to pick the flowers properly.

_"Remember," she said gravely. "You must remember to hold it THIS WAY!"_

"Well... it's that time of the year," Sensei smiled.

"Eh?"

"Genin Examination Day."

"Oh."

"We're getting two more kids to join this team. It'll be good for you to have SOME degree of human contact."

"What does that say about yourself, Sensei?" grumbled Kakashi.

"Eh?"

"N-n-nothing..."

That night, Kakashi wrote a reply to Sakura, expressing his worries about the new team. About the runaway Uchiha. He found so much to talk about -

_**Sorry for the wait! Things sure have gotten busy around here! My sensei says that he's going to be testing for two new teammates! That means I'm going to be getting a team for real!**_

_**I hope they're going to be good. To be honest, I hate idiots. Idiots who run around crying like babies – or Genins who think they're all that... (yep, I passed the Chuunin exam!) **_

_**I'm sorry to hear about your teammate... well... people who don't follow rules are – well – not worth your time to lose your heart over... I think you need to focus more on your life. He obviously isn't worth it. **_

_**Tsunade-hime? You mean the Slug Princess? Yeah. I know her. She hung out with my dad. Her teammate, Jiraiya-sama, was my dad's best friend. They're the awesomest! I want to become like them! **_

_**Well... except for the part where Tsunade gambles a lot and Jiraiya-sama is always peeking at girls... How dumb is that?**_

_**You know... in the war, they saved a lot of people with their power... although, the third one, Orochimaru... he's creepy, isn't he? I think he's going to do something bad one of these days... My dad once told me to say away from him. Whenever I see him walking down the street, I go down the other side. My old man, I guess, is right about SOME things... but... **_

_**Do I look stupid to you?**_

_**Anybody looking in those eyes sees a monster. Tch. I'm small, but I'm NOT a baby! Oh! It's time to go, Sensei's at the door! **_

_**Ja ne,**_

_**Scarecrow**_

_**p.s. Thanks for the flowers! I'll treasure them forever!**_

It was a suprise to him, when the last kanji dried, to look up and find evening already come. Time had passed by - and it seemed comforting sitting there, enjoying the silence.

The silence was warm like the fire spouting off of Gai - like his Sensei's hugs. Warm like Sakura's words.

Sakura's words.

They were so encouraging to him.

_**How about you? Are you going into the Chuunin Exams after all? I hope you don't get hurt! I'd miss my favorite penpal!**_

He owed her so much. He fingered the pressed flowers gingerly.

Tomorrow Minato would go pick up the two Genin. And Kakashi -

_**I think you're an example of determination to me!**_

Kakashi would try.

It was that time again - he wondered what it would bring.

**Review please!**

**Message to Readers: _Chapter 3_**

**Obito gave him a gift - and Kakashi could never repay it. For Obito, does he look to the future - one eye hard, the other, crying. And what can Sakura do for him, but be there...**

**Reply to Reviewers:**

_jennjennr: wow! long time no see! how's it going? things are crazy over here... ah well. as for Minato - he's a grown up Naruto. Basically. I'm going with the idea that he's Naruto's dad. V. cliched... but (shrugs) meh. As for Kakashi - yeah - I think he'd be alot like Ryuuki from Saiunkoku Monogatari - innocent but cunning, naive but genius... hahahaha... we'll see how this turns out... b/c he's gonna change. oh yeah._

_fudgemuffins: i have a little brother the age of 1 1/2... and he's so cute. i'm gonna watch carefully his growth in hopes that i can base future fanfics on him and chibis! hahaha! kids are so cute - but it's sad to write about kids trying to survive very adult situations. thanks for reviewing! it's so encouraging!_

_kureneko: (blushes) thanks for the awesome encouragement! here be the update (altho shamefully late) - i made for it in size tho... (smiles weakly)_

_kiwichi: behold serious!Sakumo... or rather depressed/suicidal!Sakumo. to be honest, i think he's alot like Jiraiya (i opine that they were best friends...) Minato is another good example of the funny/serious type. ref to other characters: Ryuuki (SaiMono), Chiaki (Nodame C), Kio (Loveless), Jin (sort of... Samurai Champloo)... you know the type: where they are very wise but sometimes really dumb. ahhahaha! oh yes! lest i forget - ISSHIN KUROSAKI from Bleach! ahhahaha! not quite... a little too melodramatic..._

_jemiul: sorry about the wait - but school came aknockin' - and i had to pull 2 allnighters (not in a row, tho) to write 2 essays on the spot... each around 20 of the final mark... (sweatdrops) I hate those..._

_xcgirl08: glad you like chibi!kakashi! and you can hug him to death! glad you loved the story and faved and alerted it! hope you enjoy this (belated TT) update!_

_.lorien: hope this looks good against the popular "letters of yesterday" - now I have to live up to something! but i'm glad you liked! thanks for reviewing so faithfully!_

_winterreise: yes. v. mind numbing really. and yes, challenging... but we'll have to see... perhaps i'll be able to pull it off... but first, there be exams... then... fanfiction extreme!_

_tootalltygerlily: thanks! i'm glad you liked! hope you enjoy this update!_

_white: if you've read "Letters of Yesterday" you know the ending, no fear! i'm a sucker for happy endings (most of the time... . )_

_awyr: someone speaking from experience? thanks for the encouragement. you ARE right. I've had to keep a hard copy of "LoY" on hand so that I get exactly the right references - especially conerning the timeline - which gave me huge issues first time around... . but i think that's just the perfectionist in me speaking... i fear that the letters themselves will take backstage this time around tho... (sweatdrops) hmmm..._

_alc fluteo: thanks for the review! and yes... this chapter starts to speed things up - but... beware! severe angst ahead:P _

_sweetnothing528: wow! another new reviewer! i'm glad you like this! and that you find it well-written. i try my best w/out a beta writer - so sometimes things get messy:P but yes, chibi!kakashi is the best to write. he's so cute..._

_sweetassassin: hello, hello, hello! nice hearing from ya! yes, i agree... this chapter will prove your tragic take on the whole thing. yes. (creeps away)_

_jovianwolfgirl: hahaha! yes. i did promise it... and it may take a while coming what with exams and all in april - but it will be done... yeah..._

_moodiful89: well, for Sakumo, i did a bit of reading - all we know is that he was 1. up there w/ the Sannins - read amazing and 2. depressed enough to commit suicide. both are very unrelated - but the reference to Sannin makes me thing that he really did hang out w/ Jiraiya - and considering the kind of person Jiraiya is... yeah... i'll leave the rest to your imagination... as for the melancholy... i feel that the vagueness surrounding Kakashi's father is great - b/c it's great fodder for us fanficcers! hope you enjoy this progressively angsty take on Sakumo!_

_sakura-bell: wanna be penpals, you ask. sure. if you click on "email", you should be able to find my hotmail address easily enough. i'm always open to chatting and ranting about anime shows/ characters (read: bishies) etc etc etc... I'm glad you're enjoying the whole show. and as for Sakura being a ditz... I tried really hard to show how normative it was for her - how she took this all for granted and went with it... which makes the unordinary that much more unordinary by parading it as ordinary - when it isn't at all... okay. it's 1:14 in the morning and i'm babbling now aren't I? ja!_

_no name: thank you. but be warned. cuteness disappears for angst:P_

_Oceanshadow: hmmm... yes. my take is Minato (Kakashi's sensei) IS Naruto's father - a plausible belief among Narutards. (shrugs) but that's the beauty of fanfiction! hahaha! and as for your suggestion - i'll try to keep that in mind... thanks for the heads up. but I can't promise too much b/c i hate repetition as well!_

_kimimarokun000: hum yes. i love irony. i love irony because we're in the know and we're laughing our guts out. _

_perscripto13: thanks! a far cry from Gentle Lesson - but a nice fresh take on KakaSaku! a nice writing excercise too!_

_dei: (takes cookies) thank you! i'm glad you were moved and enjoyed the story. to be honest, when i write them, i try my hardest to be believable - but sometimes i feel it's chintzy or cheesy. but it's great to know that something struck a good chord in you! i get that myself too every now and then... but... there's something about the ignorance of Sakura which makes us worried and excited at the same time... yeah... it's awesome that way..._

_moonprincess202: wait no more! here be magnificant (?) update!_

_christinaarr: for some reason, people really liked that "Swing Scene" as I call it... i dunno why... but there you go... this chappie, just like "LoY"'s 2nd chapter deals with Chuunin-hood. That's right. Each story was broken up into the various stages of nin-life... and this fic is no different! so... it'll be in 2 chapters that you get to see that scene... i think... i dunno..._

_chaosdragon: understand the no time, no energy. and i've changed it to "WIP"... hahaha! i didn't realize i set it that way and i'm sorry for the twitch-inducing mistake. yeah. i know how you feel when some REALLY good story gets left on the wayside. you have a kid? how nice... I have 9 siblings... there's around 23 years difference between me (the oldest) and Martin (the youngest... at 1 1/2) - so I still babysit alot! "sweatdrops" kids are lovely - but really energy inducing... right now, the only babies i've got are my fanfics! hahaha!_

_saku: i suggest you read no further than this. this is a SEQUEL. if you haven't read "Letters of Yesterday" you might be seriously confused. so. yeah... read LoY then come back. it'll all make sense then! hahaha! it's a mystery:P_


	3. Take Me In

**Title: Letters of Tomorrow**

**Warnings: Mystery, Drama, Kakashi Gaiden Fillers, eventually, Violence**

**Disclaimer: I do not own this original piece of work, neither do I gain financially from it~**

**Author's Notes: **It's been FOREVER since I updated this! -cries- GOMEN NASAI WORLD! Spring Edit 2011!

**Answers to Reviews on the bottom! Thanks for the encouragement! It looks like this fiction at least will be finished! Gentle Lesson is being updated as well!**

* * *

**Chapter 3**

**Take Me In**

_Take me in, no question's asked  
You strip away the ugliness that surrounds me  
(Who are you?)_

-Sarah Mclachlan

Kakashi landed on his feet and without looking behind – not daring to slow himself down, he moved onward, trying to keep his chakra signature well concealed and his footsteps silent. Somewhere in the small piece of forest he was training in, Sensei was waiting for him to attack. It was the usual practice session, the young Chuunin's favourite part of the day. In those moments, there was only his Sensei and him.

There was no need to think of the mission. Of the goal. Of the people depending on him to succeed. Of the eyes which looked down on his existence with disgust.

_No_, he thought._ It's just me. Sensei and I practicing jutsu... I wonder if there is something I can do to manipulate my chakra so it's stronger. Father –_ Kakashi frowned at the memory..._ Father said that if I increase my ability to manipulate different kinds of chakra, I could be able to make my own tailor made jutsu... I could surprise Sensei with it... but I'm not sure what I would go for..._

Settling down in a patch of bush, Kakashi carefully moved a branch down to stare at the back of his teacher who was sitting in front of the Memorial, shoulders slumped. Kakashi's eyes hardened.

_Shoulders slumped..._

Without the barest whisper of the air, he pulled away and moved around to get another look at the man. It could be a dummy. Kakashi had learned that the hard day during Week One. How embarrassing it would be to fall for an old trick! He edged around to get a look.

It LOOKED like Sensei – but that didn't mean anything.

_It could be a Kage Bunshin, for all I know_, he thought. _Perhaps I could throw something at him – or set something up and trigger it from a distance... yeah... that might work._

Working quickly while setting the trap, Kakashi kept an eye on the suspiciously still figure. Judging by the height of the sun in the sky, he guessed that their practice time was coming to a close. He needed to take the chance and make a move – either way...

_Sensei always has something up his sleeve_, the small Chuunin sighed. _But, I guess, that's okay – 'cause it means that I'm going to be one of the best ninja around with that kind of training... Not like Sakura-chan... she needs to talk to her Sensei... I should write her – it is my turn..._

With that thought, Kakashi made a mental note to write his young penpal friend. Darting through the underbrush, stringing his favourite wire through the branches to a tree several paces down. After making sure that he was adequately hidden, Kakashi pulled the wire hard and watched with concentration as the kunai hit the body. As he suspected, it remained inert and then poofed away into white clouds.

Something fluttered down. A white piece of paper.

Kakashi considered it lying there. Obviously a trap. But what if it was important? He contemplated it for a moment – hoping somehow that a small wind would blow it off of that particular patch of grass.

No such luck.

Nicking his thumb on his kunai, Kakashi's small hands formed the Kuchiyose no Jutsu. Pakkun appeared in the small cloud and looked up at his young master enquiringly.

"Ruff!" The young pup looked excited.

"Go get that slip of paper," Kakashi whispered. "Over there -"

"Ruff?"

"Paper, Pakkun! Go get it! Go get it, boy!"

Pakkun blinked and turned following Kakashi's finger. In a flash, the tiny pup was off the tree and at the memorial sniffing about and looking back up at his master's hiding spot in puzzlement. Kakashi sighed.

_Pakkun needs more training... and since Sensei knows where I am now..._

He lit down on the grass and picked up the small white piece of paper and waved it at Pakkun.

"See! Paper!"

"Rawr!" Pakkun barked and sniffed it.

"Nevermind... let's see what it is..."

It was a note. Scrawled across it:

"Sorry – forgot I had to pick Kushina-chan up early today for shopping. See you tomorrow sharp at 6 AM to meet your new teammates. Namikaze Sensei. p.s. You need to train Pakkun better. Consider it a take home assignment. p.p.s. Don't eat breakfast."

Kakashi drooped, letting the small note flap in the wind. Pakkun decided to drool on it.

"Ahhh... this sucks... Good thing no one saw that..."

"Ruff." Pakkun agreed.

"Yeah... okay... let's go home, Pakkun. We're gonna have to do some lessons together, I guess – if you do well, you can have a steak."

"Ruff!" Pakkun howled enthusiastically.

"No howling. And no pouting either. C'mon, let's get going home..."

That night, after spending a good three hours with Pakkun, Kakashi sat down at his small desk and considered a blank piece of paper.

_What to write? Perhaps something about practice today? About why we are practicing... Oh yeah... better warn her that I'll be out for a few months, training for Jounin nominations... and the fact that I've got two new teammates coming... I hope they're going to be okay... and there's that guy she was going on a date with... he better treat her properly!_

When he finished the letter, he sealed it and scrawled her address, making a mental note to drop it off on the way to their usual meeting place. Lying back in his bed, the young Chuunin wondered how things would change with the new teammates joining the small team. Things would be different, he was sure. He wouldn't be able to get the one-on-one training he was used to...

As he dozed off, he wondered if his Sensei would make them all do the famous bell test. He was looking forward to it.

* * *

"Hey, Kakashi," Minato waved a hand, beckoning the slowly approaching white-haired ninja. "Come meet your new teammates!"

As Kakashi approached, his dark eyes evaluated the two children who stood by his Sensei. One was a girl – with red-brown hair, kind eyes and a medics apron. She seemed calm – a good sign.

It would be disastrous to end up with a giggling idiot, he thought, remembering how the girls usually behaved at school.

The boy was a bit taller than him – with rather messy hair and excited eyes. Judging by the open smile, he was one of those extroverted types who liked to hear himself talk. Kakashi wondered if the boy was any good. When his new teammate turned, the Hatake noticed the Uchiha emblem on his clothes.

_Uchiha... well, that's good... At least, he will be competent. Perhaps. Sensei says to never judge a book by its cover..._

"Kakashi," his Sensei was saying. "This is Rin and Obito."

"Uchiha Obito," said the boy with smile, pushing back large goggles which had obscured his face. "Nice to meet you. So you're the other teammate – which is weird cause you weren't in our class. Hey! Are you from another village?"

"No," Kakashi said briefly, feeling like his worst fears were being confirmed.

"Oh..."

"Name is Hatake Kakashi," the smaller boy finally said.

"Hatake? Hmmm... not a well-known clan is it?"

"Obito!" the girl exclaimed. "Sorry, Kakashi. You can call me Rin – and forgive Obito – he's just full of himself."

"Sure, whatever," Kakashi shrugged coolly and turned to his sensei. "What is up for today? Team practice or a mission?"

"A test," his sensei said. "Everyone followed my instructions?"

A round of stomach growls greeted him.

"Good to hear," he grinned and then looked around at the training blocks set up in the middle of the field. "Ahhh... this reminds me of the good old days..." Minato stopped at the sight of Kakashi folding his arms resignedly and glaring up at him.

He laughed then. "I won't go down memory lane, Kakashi." He ruffled the boy's white hair and sighed, "You are too cute!"

"Oi," Kakashi growled. His frown deepened – especially since Obito and Rin giggled and then burst out laughing.

"Just look at his fa-face!" Obito face sunk it a mock poker face.

"It does kinda look adorable," Rin laughed.

Kakashi sniffed.

"Are we going to start or not? If we are just going to waste our time, I'm gonna go home and train Pakkun."

"Okay, okay," Minato cleared his throat. "This is not an ordinary test – you must get a bell, each of you – which I will be carrying. There are only two though – which means one person is going to lose."

"What happens when we lose?" asked Obito.

"The loser won't eat be able to eat from the bento box I ordered," Minato smiled at them. "So, remember, you guys are going to have to come at me with the intent to kill. No holding back."

"Any time limit?" asked Kakashi.

"Yes, until twelve o'clock exactly. I will ring this alarm to tell you guys your time is up – if you haven't been able to nab the bells. Understand?"

The three nodded confidently.

"I was ready, like, yesterday," boasted Obito. "I'm gonna be the first to get that bell!'

"Ehhh... Obito... don't you think we should work together on this one?" Rin asked. "Kakashi – what do you think?"

"It is an interesting problem – since he only gave us 2 bells. Someone's going to have to lose out..."

"I'm not going to lose to you – Kakashi! You watch!"

"Whatever," sighed Kakashi. "Are we going to work together – or not?"

"I'm totally gonna kick your ass! I'm gonna get one bell before you can even think about getting a bell."

"I'm going to take that as a no," Kakashi replied.

Minato raised an eyebrow at the three, catching their attention. "Okay guys, now is not the time to brag! Get ready, set – GO!"

The three children disappeared into the underbrush. Minato shook his head. He already had a feeling how this was going to turn out. It was the same way with his old teammates – and from Jiraiya-sensei's stories, it had been the same for the team of Sannin back when they had been young and under the tutelage of the Sandaime.

_No sense of teamwork. Well, not that the Sannin ever worked as a team... but... as ninja of Konoha, this is no time for solo acts – not as we go into war and need to behave like single units..._

He had a feeling it would be a long day for this group – a very long day.

"This sucks," Obito whined later on that day, rubbing his eyes. "Totally unfair! Kakashi – you play dirty!"

"Blaming others, huh," Kakashi turned away. "Typical."

"What!" yelled Obito. "Pricks like you are what I hate the most – looking down at everyone! Thinking that you're better than everyone else!"

Kakashi turned then – and Obito fell silent at the look on the smaller boy's face.

"I didn't get here without working hard -" Kakashi said. "I'm sure that if you dedicate yourself and keep pushing, you might get there – one day... You're an Uchiha, right? Isn't that what you said earlier?"

Obito leaped at the silver-haired Hatake, but Kakashi easily evaded him.

"You should know the difference in our levels right away," Kakashi added, looking down at his teammate with barely hidden condescension. "Rin had it right from the beginning – we should have worked together. In the end, because she followed my instruction, she got a bell. If you hadn't stood around trying to look good while fighting Sensei, you'd have had a chance. Don't blame me."

"Ka-ka-SHI!" Obito tried to leap up, but Minato caught him by neck and held him back.

"Obito, calm down and listen. Kakashi is right about teamwork – without it, a team cannot survive. Kakashi," Minato added, eyeing the young Chuunin. "There is being right and then there is pride. Be careful – because teamwork is a fragile thing."

"Yes, Sensei."

"But, Sensei –"

"No 'buts', Obito," Minato frowned at the young man. "Everyone, let's settle down and relax for the rest of the day – get some exercise and some practice in. I'll see you all at the regular meeting spot – at 9 AM."

With that, their blonde haired sensei poofed away – leaving behind an uneasy team. For a moment, the three stared at each other. Rin opened her mouth as if to say something but there was something discouraging about Kakashi's body language – and the young boy nodded briefly at them before he, too, disappeared. Rin sighed and stared at where the young Chuunin had last sat, recalling how cool Kakashi had been laying out the groundwork for their attack.

"Obito," she frowned, "you should have more respect for –"

But the Uchiha was already sulking down the street, glaring at the road, feeling sorry for himself. Rin sighed and ran to catch up, determined to at least cheer up one person that day.

* * *

A month passed and Kakashi wrote a letter or two, received a couple. Whenever he go mail, Kakashi discovered that it was a little difficult to wait until nightfall – until after his language lessons with Pakkun were finished for the evening. Yet, eventually he could find some time to take his time reading through the long letters. Pakkun, chewing on a bone, listened to Kakashi as he read it out loud – slowly learning to enjoy them as much as his master did.

_**Dear Scarecrow, **_

_**I remember thinking on the first day "Now that Naruto is gone, it sure has gotten quiet around here." I guess I didn't realize how much I'd miss his rather idiotic smile. Tsunade-sama isn't sure when he's going to be coming back. If he ever does.  
**_

_Wow... she works with Tsunade-sama now... Lucky... Namikaze-sensei said that she never takes students on..._

_**Well… he will, that idiot is too stupid to get killed – he's the luckiest bastard ever. But I wonder how things will be changed. Already I know that things will be different – Baka-sensei and I have been training hard (separately… the late pervert has been kept busy by Tsunade-sama).**_

_Late pervert? Oh... she must mean her teacher. What a guy! I wonder what I'll be like when I grow up and become a teacher? Should I be one? I haven't really thought about it... I hope I'd be cool like Namikaze-sensei..._

_**Today, I realized that it's been OVER two years since I saw the Naruto – and some days feel like they will last for years and years – it's like time crawls. And you stand there on a balcony or sit on the roof and look over the city and wonder if everybody else is feeling like you – and then you realize you can't ever fathom the whole mass out there – what they think, feel, desire… it's a huge world. And then… you feel –**_

_**No. I feel… so small.**_

_Sakura-chan..._

_**Ah. I'm just being an idiot! You said something about nominations for Jounin. That's gonna be hard if people hate you – if they nominate you – surely that means they are acknowledging you? I'm sure that if you try, your teammates will acknowledge you too.  
**  
Huh... as if I care what Obito thinks..._

_**But that doesn't mean you should put the 'crybaby' down so much. You kinda sound mean. In my team, I was the 'crybaby' and because of you and Naruto, I was able to change – because you guys encouraged me and told me I could be strong too. Why don't you do that for your friend?**_

Kakashi paused to imagine Sakura-chan as a cry-baby. _Would he think that she __was nothing? Didn't she change for the better because people encouraged her?_ _Perhaps Obito just needs more time._ _He is soft after all._

_**Geez.**_

_**Anyway, things have been good. This evening, I hung out with a whole pack of my friends. It's funny to see how much we've grown – and even older Chuunin like to hang out with us. What's even more weird is that this one guy is ALREADY a JOUNIN! And he's 16!**_

_Wow... I wish people would hang out already... I wonder who the Jounin is – I should check it out... It's so hard to find young people above Chuunin ranks these days..._

_**But that's the Hyuuga for you. They're always so… determined.**_

_Hyuuga? There's a young Hyuuga Jounin? I'll have to ask my Sensei... I haven't heard of any young Hyuuga getting nominated..._

_**Yrs. Sakura**_

_**p.s. The date was a failure. Now the guy can't leave me alone! Dammit!**_

Kakashi sweat-dropped. _That's Sakura-chan for you! I hope the guy knows what he's getting into! She isn't a weak flower – not any more at least...If only Sakura-chan and I could meet_, he sighed. _If only I was sure she wouldn't get mad at me for being her penpal. I probably would annoy her – she'd get all mad like the other Chuunin..._

Setting down her letter, Kakashi considered his busy day. There was, he had a feeling, a few more missions on their schedule – mainly consisting of catching pets, clearing gardens and doing odd jobs. Sensei seemed to find it interesting to watch them work – often giving tips on how to do it better. Kakashi listened, thought about it and then completed things in his own way. Rin took all suggestions and tried to make them work for her – sometimes at her expense. Obito just sniffed and said he knew what he was doing.

"Sure you know what you're doing," Kakashi snorted. "While you tear up Kanan-san's flower bulbs!"

"How the heck was I supposed to know those were off limits?"

"Obito," Rin said softly. "Sensei told us..."

"And where is Sensei anyway?" Obito asked, looking around.

The three turned and blinked at the sight of their yellow-haired Sensei leaning across the fence to talk to a red-haired woman. She seemed to be laughing a lot – and her loud voice carried across the field.

"Wow... who is Sensei with?" asked Obito. "She's kinda crazy... and look at the colour of her hair! Is she a ninja for real?"

"What does the colour of a person's hair have to do with their ability to be a ninja," Kakashi frowned. "It doesn't matter, really."

"Kakashi is right," Rin said, with a soft smile. "I have reddish hair too..."

"Oh, Rin! Well..." Obito stammered. "Th-that's not what I – I meant! I was just saying she has red hair and – and – uh – Kakashi! What's with that look?"

"It's the look of a person who's seen too many stupid things before lunch," young Kakashi sniffed. "I'm getting back to work. Sensei can talk to his fiance if he wants to – it doesn't really matter... to me..." He finished coolly and bent down to his task again.

Rin slowly followed him, glancing at her teammate's profile.

_Kakashi knows so much..._

"Ka-kashi?"

"Hm."

"You said that they are affianced?"

"Hm... well, yes, I guess..."

"So... they will get married soon?"

"Hopefully," Kakashi shrugged. "But there's war in the air – so they might have to wait a bit."

"Oh..."

"Sensei must have picked someone strong," Obito said, still standing there and watching the two adults talk. "You know, another great ninja..."

"Why would he do that?" asked Rin.

"Well... you know, so they can..." Obito petered off.

Kakashi snorted, but didn't add anything.

"Obito," Rin sighed. "We have two other missions to complete today – so you'd better help us finish this quickly."

"Bone lazy," muttered Kakashi.

Obito turned around, glared at Kakashi and then wilted at the sight of Rin's pleading face. Treading on Kakashi's fingers a little, Obito resumed his position and focused again on his work. He really hated this.

_This sucks._

Kakashi sat out on his apartment's balcony with Pakkun that night thinking about what had happened that day. Sensei had been in a good mood thanks to bumping into Kushina-san unexpectedly. This meant that he was more prone to cracking jokes and letting them do as they pleased. Although it wasn't so bad on days he could figure things out for himself, Kakashi discovered that suddenly, he had to figure out ways to rein Obito in.

_At least, that's what I tried to do_, he sighed. _I think I failed. What if it's another test that Sensei did? What if this was testing me for leadership skills? A Chuunin needs to be able to lead someone safely – and I've done it before – but now... I need to prove that I am powerful enough to lead and protect my team... If I can't get Obito to even follow my instructions on how to catch the cat..._

Kakashi sighed again.

"How 'bout writing your girl-friend?" asked Pakkun carefully. The small pug dog was highly intelligent for a summons – not many had the ability or desire to learn human speech.

Pulling Pakkun close, Kakashi enjoyed the feel of his dog's fur beneath his fingers, finding a little comfort in the fact that he had at least one person who would be able to understand him.

"I don't know... would Sakura-chan want to hear me whining about that?"

"Well... she is your friend, right?"

"Hm... I guess... she did say that I should feel free to share anything..."

"Do it! Do it!"

"Right, right... getting on it..."

Kakashi went back inside and retrieved his writing tools. Sitting back down besides Pakkun, he began his letter.

"Oi..." Pakkun said. "Your writing is bad."

"Thanks, Pakkun," Kakashi said. "That's nice to say to your Master."

"Just saying."

As he wrote, Kakashi wondered if it was really okay to admit how much he struggled with Obito. Would she be angry with me? Disappointed? Take his side? Not want to write me anymore?

_**I tried to keep your words in mind the other day, but – I swear – that kid was born just to try me. He was HALF AN HOUR late! Because "a girl lost her shoe" and he "had to find it"… geez… be more professional, you know? I didn't get to where I am by acting like an idiot!**_

_**Then, while on the mission, he totally screwed up by jumping at the cat too early – so we had to set up a totally NEW ambush for the stupid animal… Even Sensei looked kinda pissed. I think it's cause he wanted to get home earlier so he could take his girl out. **_

_**Sensei's kinda cool that way. He says that when I grow up, all the girls are going to think that I'm cool. **_

_**So… I guess I should apologize for not listening to you… I'll try to be more patient. **_

_**And even if I fail, will you still stay my friend?**_

Kakashi tried to imagine what it would be like not to get those encouraging words in the mail. It made him feel worried. Setting aside the letter, he sighed. Closing his eyes, imagining Sakura.

_Would she have red hair like Kushina-san? Or blonde-hair like Tsunade-sama? Or white hair – like Jiraiya-sama? Or black hair like Nara clan?_

"Yo, Kakashi," Pakkun said. "I think you're sleepy! You can finish it tomorrow!"

"... kay... Pakkun..."

Kakashi dragged his stuff indoors, took a quick shower and rolled into bed. When he woke the next morning, he finished the letter quickly. It wouldn't do to be late for Sensei and his team... He wished he could tell her more about the chakra manipulation he had been practicing on his own before work...

_When I finish it_, he thought, _Sensei will be so proud. Just like Sensei works on the Rensagan, I will be able to make a jutsu that will work perfectly for me! That'll show them – the village – my old teachers – Obito..._

* * *

Thanks to the increase in missions – however mundane and boring they were, Kakashi found himself kept busy. Between teaching Pakkun various things from how to speak, track targets, carry messages and work with other summonings and his own chakra manipulation experiments as he began to refine his idea into something that looked like a technique, Kakashi found his spare time happily filled, leaving no time for loneliness or regret. His sensei had to, on more than one occasion, tell the young Hatake to take it easy.

_But that's difficult_, Sensei thought, _when you can feel your past driving you forward... Kakashi hasn't learned to let go of those ghosts. All he seems to feel is a need to prove his existence with achievement – not realizing that we accept him the way he is, as he is... Will life teach him this truth, I wonder..._

One night, however, the grey-haired Chuunin returned home to find a letter waiting for him. On the front was the pretty script he always linked to Sakura. Absent-mindedly kicking his shoes off, Kakashi sat back on his bed to open and read it. Pakkun, following him in, jumped up onto the bed, panting with excitement.

"Another letter! Wow... Kakashi... you gotta be cool to have a girlfriend so early!"  
"It's not a girlfriend," Kakashi said, turning a little red. "Just a friend – who is a girl... and you know..."  
"You like her."  
"Maybe..."  
"So read it!  
"I'm trying to," Kakashi said. "But a certain mutt won't let me. Let's see..."

_**Dear Scarecrow! **_

_**Wow! This is going to be one long letter, so you better settle down for a bit!**_

"Ho ho!" Pakkun said. "She likes to write you letters, too! You're lucky, Kakashi!"  
"Hey... I haven't finished teaching you how to read yet," Kakashi warned. "So if you don't be quiet, I won't read it out to you!"  
"Fine, fine..."

_**First off –**_

_**NARUTO CAME BACK! WITH JIRAIYA-SAMA AS WELL!**_

Kakashi frowned and paused.  
"Jiraiya-sama?"  
"Jiraiya-sama?" echoed Pakkun. "Who's that?"  
"He's one of the Sannin. My Sensei's sensei... but if he had come in – Sensei would have taken off a few days to meet with him..."  
"Maybe your girlfriend is soft in the head."  
"She's not my girlfriend – and she's NOT – where did you learn that from?"  
"Father used it – talking about my cousin –"  
"I don't wanna know," Kakashi shook his head. "I'll just ask Sensei."

_**How he has changed – Naruto… not Jiraiya-sama… he looks as old as ever! Hahaha!**_

_**But Naruto!**_

_**He's grown tall! And smarter… sort of… Of course, he's just as perverted as usual! DAMMIT! Why can't boys grow out of stupid perversion… Not that my sensei was any better. Apparently Naruto gave him a gift – the as yet to be released Makeout Tactics… **_

_**Gah! Idiot men and their perversion.**_

"Naruto?" Pakkun said. "Who is he?"  
"Her teammate," Kakashi said absently.

He had checked the shinobi listings to find the kid, but he couldn't find Naruto anywhere... I don't know what's going on – but more and more, I feel like Sakura and I are... like... from different villages – or worlds – but that's impossible... I really should talk to Sensei...

"So he's your rival, then?"  
"What? Who?"  
"Naruto."  
"No," Kakashi replied scornfully. "That's idiotic."  
"Just saying, he's there with her." Pakkun added meaningfully, "Every. Day."  
"I don't think she'd fall for an idiot like that," Kakashi said firmly. Then paused. "Right?"

Pakkun shrugged.

"I don't know. Girls don't make sense."

Kakashi thought of Rin who always stayed at him with a strange expression like he had two heads or something.

"Yeah, talk about it."

_**Anyway… yeah… there was this whole reunion thing. He was a bit in shock when he found out that I was a Chuunin… that everyone in the class was – except for him (and Sasuke…) Well… yeah… **_

_**And you know what? He didn't even comment on my new look! I'd been trying so hard to look like a lady and what did he say? **_

"_**You haven't changed at all, Sakura-chan!"**_

_**Is that supposed to be a compliment? GAAAHHHHH!**_

Kakashi and Pakkun laughed then. It reminded Kakashi of the time Jiraiya-sama and Sensei had visited his home and talked about the craziness of girls. The young nin sobered at the memory. It had back then. Back then. When his father had smiled more often and had still tried to move past it all.

_Sakura-chan..._ Kakashi thought. _Sometimes I'm not sure what to think around you..._

_**Then of course, we had to be put through another BELL test. What's up with Bell Tests? Did you ever have to do a bell test with your team? Probably not. My sensei is psycho, that's what.**_

_**Well… he's that good, is all. We couldn't get it any other way than Naruto's super surprising idea to pin him down by telling him the plot line of Make Out Tactics. WHICH MEANS NARUTO'S READ THAT SHIT! DAMMMITTTT!**_

_**What's with men and that series!**_

_I wonder if I'll ever be like that_, Kakashi thought. _Surely not. But... it's cool that she had to do the bell test too! Seems like her teacher knows how to test people at least... if nothing else..._

_**Anyway, we beat our sensei – it wasn't really fair, per se. But as Sensei says… you gotta learn how to manipulate your enemy. Find his weak spot and exploit it.**_

"Sakura-chan is so cool," Kakashi said after a moment. "She's so strong!"  
"And she's older than you too," Pakkun added. "Way to go – hitting it off with older woman."  
"What?" Kakashi blinked. "She is my age."  
"She writes like an older woman, Kakashi."  
"But, we started around the same time!"  
"Well..." Pakkun sighed. "That's weird – but the way she talks – it's like an older girl, right?"

"I should talk to Sensei about this..."

_**At any rate, it was a good time. I don't know what we're going to do now, though… without Sasuke, we're missing a teammate… will we have to get a new one? And as for missions – are we going to do mission duty? Or search for Sasuke?**_

_**Or train more together?**_

_**The future holds so many possibilities.**_

_Good luck, Sakura-chan_, Kakashi thought. _I'm sure you will continue to be a strong ninja!_

_**Which reminds me about you and your predicament with your team. I know that you find it hard to stand your teammate, but if you can, please try – over and over again. At least, stop beating on him. Like… make your first step – I don't know – keep it verbal…**_

_**But you know what, even if you never become best friends – if at best you remain rivals, that doesn't mean I think you're a bad, evil person (like Orochimaru). Just somebody who needs me to be there more and more. **_

Kakashi froze and re-read the sentence.

_What..._

" if at best you remain rivals, that doesn't mean I think you're a bad, evil person (like Orochimaru)..."

_What? Orochimaru-sama? Jiraiya's teammate? One of the three great Sannin?_

Kakashi had seen the tall, dark-haired ninja from a distance. _Although Namikaze-sensei never actively talks about Orochimaru... so maybe..._

He shook his head...

_This isn't just weird – it's impossible... I need to talk to Sensei. Seriously._

_**I do think you need to sharpen your social skills because they seem to stink – but don't worry. I'll be there for you. Always. I promise.**_

_**As for my sensei, he's really annoying and stuff but you know what, I respect him because he taught us the value of teamwork. Teamwork is what matters – because people are more important than jutsu.**_

_**Ahhh! Look at this thing! It's super long! I should really stop now – but I just want to make sure you're okay and everything's fine… oh wait…**_

_**GAAKKK! You'd not guess! But someone's attacking Sand – I gotta run!**_

_**See you and love you always,**_

_**Sakura**_

Thoughtfully, Kakashi folded the letter and stowed it away in his satchel. Sensei had told them to pack for a two day mission out to a spa. Obito had been beside himself with excitement. Kakashi had philosophically nodded, knowing that it would more than likely include a job like fixing fences or guarding some celebrity who had come into their neck of the woods. Sometime during the mission, he'd have to talk to his sensei...

His penpal wasn't making sense... Something small and disturbing was growing in his mind – a feeling of something not quite right – something just a little off-kilter. So big and huge it was hard to imagine.

_I need a second opinion._

"Sensei," Kakashi's quiet voice broke into Minato's thoughts as they sat together and looked up at the stars from the quiet of the hot pool the two of them were soaking in. Somewhere inside, Rin and Obito were practising report writing – a small task assigned to them by Sensei to help them get a grasp of the kinds of responsibilities Chuunin had to bear. Kakashi, used to the task, had finished his quickly, knowing that his Sensei would scold him for his not-so-legible scrawl...

_But I need some alone time to ask him about Sakura-chan..._

"Kakashi?"

"I have a question... about my pen pal..." Kakashi's eyes were serious.

_Too serious_, Minato thought. So the older man held his tongue and didn't say the first teasing remark that rose at the awkward young Chuunin's words.

"Pen pal... hmm... Sakura-chan, right? What's wrong? Did you get into a fight?"

"No, no," Kakashi said hastily. "It's what she's writing about. In her letters – she is changing too quickly... and she's talking about things that don't exist – things that haven't happened – but to her – it's so real... and I wonder – is someone playing a joke on me? Is she crazy?" His voice dropped to a whisper. "Is she going to be okay?"

For the first time, Kakashi's face, free of the mask and his professional soldier face, seemed so vulnerable. Minato felt his throat tighten a little.

_Sometimes, as I take care of this team_, he thought, _Kakashi projects a kind of cool, in control aura – it would be easy to forget that he is young – and sensitive like any of us..._

"Why don't you read me the bits that worry you and we can think it over?"

Kakashi was gone in a flash. He returned and, sitting with his toes in the water, he read the letter in its entirety. Minato's gaze grew more thoughtful as the letter finally ended. It was indeed mysterious. Kakashi folded the letter carefully back into his tiny satchel (stashed at the bottom of his bag, it held the most important documents a ninja should always carry). Then, he slipped into the water, making sure that everything was safely stowed away on the wood porch which opened out into the private bath.

"Sensei?"

"That's..." Minato paused. "Kakashi... you know – in this world, many strange things happen. Your letters may be something more miraculous than one would think possible."

"Like... travelling through space and time?" Kakashi said it nonchalantly, as though it wasn't the dumbest thing to say aloud.

Minato laughed then, finding it too funny. Kakashi flinched.

"No, sorry, Kakashi. I'm not laughing at the idea," Minato said. "I'm laughing at the irony of it – that of all people to get a space-time rift going on – it's you... So many people have spent their whole lives trying to break those boundaries... and here you are, writing letters with a girl from our future..."

There was a pause. Then, Minato's face became more serious. He glanced at the innocent-looking pile of stuff which Kakashi had piled on the porch. Inside the clothing, there was a letter which held information no person could ever possibly know.

"But Sensei," Kakashi said, moving closer to his Sensei. "She said –" Here, his voice dropped to a whisper. "That Orochimaru-sama is evil! Th-that can't be true, right?"

"Kakashi," Minato hunked down to meet the Chuunin's worried gaze. "Sometimes things happen – that are outside of our control. What I'll do is personally keep an eye on things – so if anything looks strange or out of place, we can respond well. But you, Kakashi," he paused and said slowly and heavily, trying to impress his student with the importance of what he was going to say. "You are going to be faced with the hardest task ever."

"Yeah?" Kakashi said warily.

"Practising patience, watching your step – and doing nothing."

Kakashi's eyes narrowed. "Nothing? Is that okay? What if bad things happen?"

"What if they are supposed to happen?"

"But what if they really hurt Konoha?"

"Yes, and what if by not happening, Konoha is further destroyed?" Minato sighed. "Kakashi, this is one of the reasons why this kind of ability is probably beyond our reach – the power to change things that we shouldn't change would be too great a temptation. Do you understand, Kakashi? Let's see what events take place – and do our best to remain vigilant."

"What do I say to Sakura-chan?"

"I'd say nothing," Kakashi's sensei said. "I know that feels like lying – but it's best if she doesn't become burdened by what is happening."

"Okay."

The two sat there for a moment in silence, enjoying the quiet chirp of the night lfie around them. Inside, they could hear the cheerful voices of Rin and Obito. It had been a good day for the Genin. Kakashi wondered if it would be possible to hold onto this moment for a bit longer...

_Soon the world will come in and take us away_, he thought. _Obito, Rin, the missions we have set for tomorrow, the war... just as before, when I came home to Father..._

"Kakashi," Minato sighed. "On nights like these, I have to admit that I wish things could stay this way forever."

"Same here," Kakashi hesitated. "Well, I'd like to be Jounin one day – so I can prove to everyone that Hatake doesn't equate with loser. But other than that, today was okay. And sitting here is nice."

"Be patient," the older ninja smiled down at the short Chuunin. "You've broken records already, no need to push ahead for something... but... I didn't want to say anything... I did nominate you for Jounin, a few weeks back..."

"Seriously?"

"Well... you are proving yourself to be a great shinobi – responsible, resolute, determined, intelligent and careful. With tons of natural talent too! And a good teacher. Hahahaha..."

Kakashi allowed himself a small smile. Perhaps he would be able to become Jounin sooner than he had hoped! He'd be able to lead a team – and show how much he could be an asset for Konoha!

"Don't rush things, Kakashi," Minato said after a moment, laughter dying down again. "I have a feeling that things are going to escalate – just the way rumours have been flying – and the news I've heard in the Jounin's lounge... the Hokage talked to me as well... and things don't look good at all. Before you know it, time will speed us forward – and our tomorrows will become yesterdays."

He leaned back to gaze up at the stars.

"They look down at us, seemingly unchanged – and I wonder sometimes, if they also undergo the passage of time – like us – and in the future, maybe the same future as Sakura-chan, they look just a bit different. Perhaps not. Perhaps, what binds us all together, in the end, are the unchanging things of life..."

"I have a feeling you are going to say something about the fire of life again," Kakashi said.

"Good man!"

"Stop ruffling my hair."

"Gotta do it now," Minato laughed. "I have a feeling I won't be able to do it when a certain shortie becomes a Jounin!"

"Sensei..."

"Hm?"

"You think this war will be long?"

"I don't know, Kakashi, I don't know. I hope not."

"Me too."

* * *

Life went on – Kakashi and his pen pal exchanged a few more letters – and the tensions which had been brewing throughout Kakashi's life began to mount up like towering storm clouds. Life became even more hectic as the young Chuunin juggled personal training with mission work. When the war was officially announced (as official as wars can be announced), Team Minato found themselves even more busy. Kakashi fell asleep easily each night.

He could hardly wait until the day he could show his new jutsu – but he also realized that things would be difficult for everyone. Under the pressure, Kakashi's found himself twice as short with Obito and less forgiving of his incompetency.

One day, the three kids stood on a plain before their Sensei. Obito had shown up late – as usual – with a string of excuses as to why he hadn't made it on time.

"Something got in my eye!" he had said. Kakashi even more strict than usual had berated him for his lateness. Perhaps it was the way Obito had whined, but his favourite monologue on the importance of following rules. It didn't help that Sensei had been more lenient than usual. It was a big day after all.

He was now Jounin.

Obito obtusely asked, "What was it again?"

"Well..." Minato said mildly. "Today, Kakashi is inaugurated as a Jounin, just like me." He started walking, with the team walking alongside across the plain to the point where they would have to part ways. "To make missions efficient, myself and his team will be split. Since the military power of Konoha has hit an all-time low now."

Obito frowned, "Split... then..."

"Yes, that's right." Minato nodded. "Kakashi will become the commander of your three man team... and I'll be on my own."

Rin sighed, "I told you about it before... Obito. To give Kakashi a present."

"Sorry... I wasn't listening."

Kakashi twitched, turning to glare at his teammate out of the corner of his eye.

Ignoring the glares, Minato held out one of his special kunai. "I'll give you this! It's a special kunai!" Twirling it, he held it up and then passed it over. "It's a little heavy because of it's odd shape but when you get used to it, it's easy to use. Take it with you on today's mission."

Kakashi nodded and pocketed it. Rin shyly held out a small pack.

"This is from me! Here!"

Obito's brow furrowed a little as he watched her offer the special gift with a quiet smile.

_She's always liked him... Geez..._

"A personal special medical bag..." She was explaining. "You've improved so much that it should be easy to use!"

Kakashi nodded, "Thanks." He held out a hand toward to Obito.

Obito drew back, "Wha... what's with the hand? I didn't do anything for you!" His voice rose, angry and slightly embarassed. "Absolutely nothing!

The grey-haired new Jounin snorted, "That's fine... make yourself useful... Carry my stuff for me!"

"It's a mystery how you ever became a Jounin!"

"I don't want to talk to you about it."

"I am Obito of the Uchiha Clan!" The dark-haired boy pointed at Kakashi. "I will surpass you - as soon as I awaken this Sharingan!"

Kakashi resisted rolling his eyes at his loud-mouthed teammate. "The Uchiha Clan are all elite ninjas, aren't they...? That's what I thought but..."

"Whhaaat...?"

"You guys quit it!" Rin protested.

"Heeey..." Minato's voice cut into their argument. "Can I explain the mission now? We're almost at the country border."

Falling silent, they followed their sensei across wildlands to the rendevous place they needed to reach. It was enemy territory now – so Minato carefully chose a place to hunker down and draw out his map. After explaining the mission, the two new teams crept carefully into enemy territory. However, things began to go wrong from the beggining – first, they bumped into enemies in the forest. Kakashi had been more than happy to show off his new jutsu – but in the end, Minato had forbidden him to use it. Then, when Minato left – and after they had been travelling for some time, the new team had been ambushed by two ninjas.

One minute they were walking on water, the next minute, they were under attack and Rin was kidnapped. The two boys stood there, looking at each other.

Kakashi quickly thought through the options and then said, "The two of us will resume the mission."

"Rin..." Obito frowned. "What about Rin?"

"Leave Rin for now." Kakashi shook his head. "The enemy wants to know our aim. They won't kill her yet. Besides, luckily, Rin's a medical ninja. Even as a prisoner, she should be treated well, as long as she looks after the enemy's casualties."

Obito remembered Minato's words before they had parted, "More importantly, the issue is the enemy discovering our aim. If they find out, they'll go straight to prepare the bridge for an attack. If that happens, the mission will become too difficult."

The dark-haired Uchiha shook his head. "What you're saying doesn't include Rin's safety!" He stared at his teammate hoping that Kakashi would see reason. "If those guys were just unthinking flunkies, what would happen then? More importantly than the mission - we have to rescue Rin!"

Kakashi sighed, "... As a shinobi... sometimes it's essential to sacrifice your companions for the accomplishment of the mission. That's a Law." His eyes drooped at a memory Obito could only guess at. "If the mission fails, the war will continue and many more sacrifices may occur."

"That's just speculation." Obito disagreed. "Just for that, you'd simply throw away a companion who's been with your through thick and thin. When you and I were injured, she saved our lives with her medical jutus! If she hadn't been there, we'd be long dead!"

"That's Rin's duty," Kakashi said curtly.

Obito's barely stemmed anger boiled out – his eyes wild, his fists clenched and shaking, he moved forward before Kakashi could react and punched the Jounin hard in the jaw. Kakashi, thrown back onto the ground, hoisted himself up onto his elbows and then feet silently.

"I definitely can't stand you!" Obito yelled.

Kakashi remained unmoved. "... Whether you hate me or not, I'm still your commander." His eyes hardened. "You must obey my instructions. No matter what happens, if the team is scattered, there's only one leader. Therefore, you must follow the instructions of the commander... Obito. You haven't got any strength. Because of that, I'm this team's leader."

"If that's the cae, why do you refuse to help?" Obito demanded. "Only you have the strength to save your companion!"

"If you let your emotions run free and fail your mission, you'll regret it in the future. Because of that, the rule was decided that a shinobi must kill his emotions. You must understand that too."

"... Rin... Rin gave you a medical pack out of concern for you! And she sewed a charm into it!"

"The medical pack and the medical jutsu," Kakashi felt like he was explaining to a child, "... were created to increase the success rate of the mission. That is the brilliant system devised by Konoha." The short, white-haired shinobi sighed. "Wasn't it yesterday, when I said "If you receive unnecesary things, they just become excess luggage"? The most important thing to a shinobi is to be a tool in order to complete the mission."

A pause. Then: "Emotions are unnecessary things."

Obito stared at Kakashi as if the young boy had grown two heads. "Are you serious...?"

Kakashi stared back at him unmoved.

"Do you seriously think like that?"

He couldn't help it – suddenly before him, he could see iit – the back of his father, white hair blowing in the breeze, brushing over his favourite tanto blade strapped to his back.

_Father learned it the hard way..._

"Yes... that's right..." Kakashi finally said.

"Fine then..." Obito said, disgusted. "From the beginning, you and I were like water and oil. I'm going to rescue Rin!" Shoving Kakashi away, he turned.

Kakashi called after him, desperate now. He could just see it – his first mission a total failure. "You don't understand anything! What happens to those who don't follow the rules..."

"I believe that the White Fang is a true hero," Obito declared.

Kakashi's eyes widened.

"Of course, those in the ninja world who break the rules and regulations are called trash..." Obito turned then to stare his teammate in the eye. "But... those who don't care about their companions are even worse trash. Anyway, if I'm that kind of trash, I'll break the rules! If that's not being a true shinobi... then I'll crush that idea of a shinobi!"

They separated wordlessly then. Kakashi, sped through the forest, his stomach leaden with an uncomfortable feeling. For the first time, he felt like something wasn't right...

_What would Sakura do? Would she turn her back on her teammates? She always talked about them with a lot of care... Would this be something Sensei would do? Father would do?_

He landed a little hard on the ground – and grunted as a shooting pain wrenched up through his arm. It brought back Rin's words: "It's pretty much mostly healed now. But if you overdo it the wounds will open."

Defeated, he stared down at his hands – at the green below his fingers. Listening to the condemning silences of the forest. He could just see it – Obito trying – and failing... _Obito..._ He could hear the his words...

"When you and I were injured, she saved our lives with her medical jutsu! If she hadn't been there, we'd be long dead! More importantly than the mission... we have to rescue Rin!"

And Sensei... "Kakashi... of course, the rules and regulations are important but... that's not all there is to it."

Kakashi looked down.

_Rules and regulations were what kept people safe. People who broke them – Father – would inthe end become broken. But there was Obito... Obito... You..._

"I believe that the White Fang is a true hero... Of course, those in the ninja world who break the rules and regulations are called trash... but... those who don't care about their companions are even worse trash."

He knew what he had to do. As he turned around, Kakashi found that fueled with this new feeling, somehow everything would fall into place. Maybe things wouldn't even work out – but at least, he'd be able to live with himself at the end of it... he hoped._ Perhaps, it was too late..._

* * *

For a moment, there was darkness – but when the spots cleared, he managed to struggle to his elbows, sitting up.

"Nguh..."

Rin was beside him, scratched up – but mostly safe and sound. For a moment, Kakashi tried to remember – then it all came to him – a rock coming down – apparently – and suddenly there was Obito, pushing him out of the way with a warning...

_Obito..._

"Are you ok...? Rin... Kakashi..." A soft voice asked.

Kakashi looked forward – and his eyes widened. Rin was already frozen with shock. Without thinking, Kakashi crawled over to his teammate – his friend – and tried to lift up the boulder. Arms quivering, he gritted his teeth – feeling as weak and as insignificant as an ant.

"Obito!" He gritted out. "SHIT!"

"That's enough..." was the boy's slow reply. "It's ok..."

_No. It's not okay!_ Kakashi yelled inwardly, wishing he had the power to smash the rock to bits.

"Kakashi, it looks like it's over for me... The right side of my body is almost smashed... There's no feeling in it..."

Over his rough, panicked panting, Kakashi could barely hear Rin's "...No... ...This... ...Why..."

Obito coughed. Rin flew to his side.

"Obito..."

The impossibility of the whole situation overwhelmed him – he wanted to scream, shout, kick something – hit something – hurt something – Without thinking he slammed a fist against the earth, scarcely feeling the pain.

"Dammit!" Kakashi yelled. "I... From the beginning if I'd gone along with what you'd said and went with you to rescue Rin... Something like this wouldn't have happened! ...What kind of commander? What kind of Jounin...?"

"Hey..." Obito said. "No... Forget it..."

Rin looked up inquiringly – surprised at how calm Obito seemed.

The Uchiha continued. "I'm... the only one... who didn't... give you a present... at your Jounin celebration... right... Kakashi..."

Kakashi looked up, puzzled, unsure of where Obito was going with this.

"What would be good... I was thinking... and now... I've come up with it..." Obito's voice came out weakly – slowly – as though every word cost him. Kakashi didn't want him to talk – but somewhere deep down, he knew he had to treasure every moment. "What... don't worry... It's not useless... baggage..." Obito managed to get out. He took a deep breath and tried to smile. "It's this Sharingan... of mine. ...the people in the village... what they must have been saying... that you're... a great Jounin... That's... how I feel... Please accept it... Rin... with your medical jutsu... please take out my Sharingan... and implant it... into Kakashi's left eye..."

Rin was stunned – but she understood right away. With a determined look entering her tear-swollen eyes, she turned to the white-haired Jounin and said, "Kakashi, come over here...! So we can start quickly!"

_What – what – how could this –_ Kakashi felt unsure if this would work. It seemed almost cruel. Heartless. How could he accept such a gift after being given his life?

"I'm already... going to die..." Obito explained. "But... I can become your eye... and from now on I will see the future..."

Kakashi knew then the new responsibility Obito was placing on him. He would not squander this gift – he would carry on Obito for the rest of his life. Never again would he be alone. And there was Rin. Rin, who was beloved of Obito...

When the time came to face the surviving ninja, Obito asked Kakashi –

"Kakashi... take care... of Rin..."

Kakashi nodded with new determination glinting in both eyes, "Right..."

* * *

That day, he kept his promise – destroying the last nin, pulling Rin out of the quickly collapsing hole, gazing down long enough to see Obito's last gentle smile. He wondered what Obito was thinking – _Rin, perhaps?_

But Kakashi's musings were cut short with the new threat – Stone reinforcements. It was there, on the rock, as he formed the seals for his new jutsu, that he realized what his future could become. Even if he lasted for only a few minutes more, as long as his promise was kept – as long as Rin was kept safe...

"Rin... Obito liked you... loved you... you were important to him... Because of that, I'll protect you through life and death."

Rin gasped, "Then! Kakashi... My feelings..."

Kakashi shook his head and turned away, "I – I was once... the kind of trash that would abandon you..."

He thought of Sakura. _Would he be able to face her with the memory of betrayal? The memory of failure? For Obito, he would protect Rin. Rin's love... isn't something I deserve... As I am, I am perhaps, fit for no one... I can only face the now – and work to make our tomorrows yesterday._

* * *

Blackness. Warm darkness. Then starlit night. The change was slow – and there was quietness.

"Hmmm..." A familiar voice said above his head. "Looks like he's awake..."

"Sensei!" Kakashi bolted upright, confused. He had bolted forward with the chidori – and the Sharingan activated. Now, he was here – on the edge of the forest, on a rock, below the stars. "Why?"

Sensei smiled and held up the kunai. "The mark on this kunai is a jutsu type that alerts me when it flies."

"So... the enemies..."

"I defeated them all..."

"What about Rin...?" Kakashi looked around wildly. "What happened to Rin?"

Minato pointed to the girl who stood apart from them, in the field looking up.

_Probably thinking about Obito – about what happened... in the end, Obito, I wasn't the one to protect her in the end... When will I ever be strong enough?_

"I'm sorry I wasn't in time, Kakashi..." Sensei sighed. "I heard it all from Rin..."

"Yeah," Kakashi's shoulder's slumped. "I totally failed, didn't I? As a shinobi –"

"But not as a friend," Sensei clasped Kakashi's shoulder, causing the young boy to raise his head. Minato's fingers brushed against Kakashi's still red cut below his eye. "Your eye is a gift which will always remind you of what you found today."

"Now the war will go on even longer," sighed Kakashi.

"Oh, I don't know about that," Sensei smiled. "The mission is still on. Now that my job at the front line is done, we can deal with the original message – and then get back home. How's that, Captain Kakashi?"

Kakashi smiled back tentatively and nodded. 'Okay."

* * *

When he went home mission complete, Kakashi wrote a long letter to Sakura. It felt inadequate. The words which came didn't seem to fit what he felt. It remained a personal experience – something he would never be able to fully put into words – written or spoken. But it was there... it had changed everything.

He hoped she would understand. But, for a long time, there was no response. Kakashi watched the mail carefully – and as time went on, he wondered if the girl had forgotten about him. It would be understandable...

So sitting down, he wrote another letter complete with apology, hoping this time there would be a reply.

_**You haven't written for awhile. I'm kinda worried. Did I say something annoying in my last letter?**_

_**How are things going? Life has gotten quiet now that the treaties have been signed. Although… there have been rumors of a giant tailed monster.**_

_**How weird is that?**_

_**Anyway! I hope you write soon!**_

_**Missing you,**_

_**Scarecrow**_

_If it doesn't happen... what will I do? It's not like I will be able to find her – will I?_

For a week, the young Jounin worried. Despite the busyness surrounding the wrap up of a war, Kakashi wondered what life would be like with no pen pal. Somehow, she had become more important than he had thought possible.

_Maybe Sensei is right..._

Then, one day, in the mail, he found a letter. It had familiar handwriting. On a pink envelope. No one sent stuff to him in pink envelopes. Not even his most rabid fan girls at the academy. Making sure that no one noticed him slipping it inside his vest, the "Copy Ninja Kakashi" slipped into his apartment trying to restrain from tearing the envelope off.

It was Sakura. Quickly he found a seat on his bed and started reading it.

_**Dear Scarecrow, **_

_**Things have gotten really complicated.**_

_**My sensei, for example, has been laid up in the hospital for a long time – and has JUST got out. That's what happens when you're a genius and you overdo it!**_

_**People sometimes go above and beyond their capabilities for other people – don't they?**_

He thought of his new jutsu and smiled.

_**Well… that's my sensei. And Naruto, too, is no better. **_

_**Yamato-sensei, Naruto and Sensei have been hanging out a lot lately – I think they're training Naruto in something… It has to do about wind natures and stuff like that – but Naruto never makes any sense to start with.**_

_**Yamato-sensei can make a huge waterfall? Seriously? I don't believe it.**_

_Wow... these people in the past sure are flashy! I wonder if I'll know a bunch of jutsu by then... or... what if I'm writing to someone a hundred years from now – maybe I'll never meet her..._

_**At any rate, Naruto's left me alone – and Sai has been spending a lot of time in the library trying to figure out how to socialize… he needs help. Seriously. Calling Ino 'gorgeous' – but I'm a 'hag'? A hag! That's what he called me!**_

_**I am so not a hag! **_

_I wonder what she looks like, seriously. But I guess, she'd think I was creepy if I asked for a photo..._

_**He's gonna have to spend A LOT more time in the library if he's going to succeed. We'll ALL have to work a lot harder if we're going to succeed… **_

_**We DID meet Sasuke again – but he's so changed! I don't know what to think of him anymore.**_

_**Sensei says that 'Sasuke is Sasuke' and that inside he's still the same person. But Sasuke isn't the boy I loved – oops! You know my secret now! Ahh… don't tell anyone… okay? I don't want people to laugh at me for holding onto a crush so pathetically all these years.**_

_So she's over him then?_ Kakashi wasn't sure what to read in between the lines. But a part of him felt hopeful.

_**At any rate, the future seems really uncertain now. Who knows what tomorrow holds – right? **_

_**But this I know – with your encouragement, and the backing of Naruto and Sensei, Sasuke will be brought back. Because with teamwork, we can do anything!**_

_**Yours forever,**_

_**Sakura.**_

Kakashi read the last two lines a couple times...

_Yours forever, huh... I wonder who Sakura-chan likes now... and... maybe we are closer than I think... maybe Sensei and I are just being crazy people... maybe this is all just a grand joke... but I hope it isn't... I know it can't be – Sakura isn't a prankster like that... I know... she is so honest and courageous... and... just reading her letter has made me feel better. She isn't mad at me... and she is right..._

_With teamwork, we can do anything!_

* * *

**Read and review!**

**Message to Readers: Disgusting long chapter! Next one: Kakashi's ANBU life!**

**Response to Reviewers:**

Hatake Kai: Here's another update! Enjoy!

AcademicDragon: Tell me what you think!

Dancers and Pharaohs: Sorry for the wait! Life got crazy busy!

sakuzi-chan: Sorry for the length of time! LoY and LoT have been fun to write - but lately - meiyou time! So sad! Thanks for the compliments!

Mary B. Wolf: Thanks a ton! I do try to go for unique - when it comes to popular fandoms. Hopefully this update will be pleasing!

lu: Got two more chappies to write...

monodie: Kakashi's POV is a little more interesting. I found another plot hole - so we'll see what I do with it. Kyehehehe...

Kima-Mitsura: Sorry. I'm a teacher now (for real) so classroom life can be pretty demanding. Hopefully things will iron out more in the future...

Ayame1313: Here you go!

Ani: SORRRY! I can't promise about adding to the future... we'll see...

naruto-ddrchamp: Here it be~ Hope you enjoy~

yui/alex: I think that coming back to this story after 2 years will be difficult - since the feeling won't be the same - hopefully it will still be enjoyable...

lobster-nin02: I have never watched The Lake House because to be honest I am not a chick-flick movie watcher... but this story kinda came out of thinking about that movie with Jim Caviezel... Yeah...

YourAngelStandingBy: It is kinda... trippy, if you think about it too long. Teehehehee~

Chaerring Trinity: Hmmm... possibly... I will need to double-check... I'm not sure... grrr... I found another plothole thingy - so I'm trying to see if I can explain at least one away... lolz...

clea everlasting: Thanks~ Enjoy~

Sora Inu-chan: Thanks a ton! Hopefully the update will be ok!

Jennjennr: Totally hear you. My life has been MADNESS. It's what happens when you get a life! urgh... Well... here goes nothing!

feifu: Thanks! Enjoy~

tootalltygerlily: Hopefully I'll get the other two out sooner than later! -crosses fingers-

no name: Well, the best thing about writing is making your own style - so if cute and angsty mix - bonzai!

SweetAssassin: Tiny Kakashi is awesomeness~

moodiful819: Hopefully, I'll find some time to spell check it... *sweatdrops*

Seriv: Dramatic Irony is FTW! Fanfiction is the best way for us to enjoy our minor characters, ne? Thanks for the encouragement!

SweetNothings528: Yes! Kakashi fanclub! Kyehehehe!

Jovianokamigirl: I think we can all guess by cannon how this is all going to go down! Kyehehehe... The good and the bad...


	4. Walking Through ShadowLand

**Title: Letters of Tomorrow**

**Warnings: Mystery, Drama, Kakashi Gaiden Fillers, eventually, Violence**

**Disclaimer: I do not own this original piece of work, neither do I gain financially from it~**

**Author's Notes: **Spring Edit 2011

**Answers to Reviews on the bottom! Thanks for the encouragement! It looks like this fiction at least will be finished! Gentle Lesson's last chapter is being updated as well!**

* * *

**Letters of Tomorrow: The Sequel**

**Walking Through Shadowland**

"_Oh I don't understand  
How by the touch of your hand  
I would be the one to fall  
Oh, I miss the little things  
I miss the simple things  
Oh, and I miss everything, everything about you"  
- Sarah Mclachlan_

Summer slowly faded into fall. Fall blended like watercolour painting into white winter and then bloomed bright in spring. Before Kakashi knew it, a year had passed since the end of last Great War. It amazed the young Jounin how the seasons seemed so unchanging – despite war and the bloodshed. The blood which soaked into the earth. There was something comforting that some things could never change. Like the inevitability of fall, the short burst of birth in the spring, the heat of summer and the cleanliness of winter. After training with Rin, the small team went out on an easy mission to the farm.

_A good place_, Kakashi thought, as he dragged out each fence plank through the hard dirt, carefully stepping past the cow pats. _Stinky... but at least it's fresh..._ Glancing at Rin, who was working on filling the horse trough with hay, Kakashi wondered if he should try to be a bit more friendly to his teammate. _There's something kinda... sad... about her..._

_Obito..._

His small shoulders slumped at the memory of the loud-mouthed, impetuous ninja who had saved his life.

_You would would have loved it here..._

At quarter to twelve, Kakashi called a lunch break and the two ninjas sat on a blanket Rin had thoughtfully packed and enjoyed the serene scenery. Well, mostly enjoyed the scenery. Kakashi was busy beating himself up mentally for his thoughtlessness.

_You should've been the one to think of the blanket! You're the team captain! How thoughtless can you get, Kakashi? Why is Rin always having to think up these things?_

"I like it here," Rin said, breaking the silence with a quiet sigh.  
"Yeah..." Kakashi lamely agreed, wondering if Rin was going to be mad at him.

He glanced sideways at the girl.

_No. Of course not. She's never mad at you. Even when she should be..._

It made his mouth feel a bit bitter, his shoulders tensed. The grey-haired Jounin jumped three inches in the air when a small hand squeezed his shoulder.

"R-r-ri-rin!"  
"Sorry! Sorry! I thought you looked a little... down... You're so tense!"  
"Yeah... sorry... I'm glad I wasn't eating anything there..."  
"I"m glad too."  
"Well, you could save me though. As a medic, I'm sure you know all the manoeuvres..." Kakashi turned to glare at the green grass surrounding Rin's pink and green checkered picnic blanket. "...for scenarios with... choking..." He added, feeling even more inadequate than ever.  
"You mean, I know better than to hit someone on the back?"  
"Yeah... that kind of thing..."  
"Kakashi... Some thing is bothering you. You can share it with me, if you want..."

Kakashi began to tear up the grass.

"I thought we were friends," Rin said softly. "Hey! What did the grass do to you?" Her joke fell flatter than a pancake.  
"Sorry..." Kakashi let the shredded greenery go and sighed again. "I just feel so dumb, you know... I forgot the picnic blanket... and it just seems like I can never get things right."  
"Well, you need to relax a bit... enjoy making a few mistakes."  
"But if this was war –"  
"But it isn't." Rin rolled her eyes. "And, Kakashi, if we forgot our picnic blanket on the battlefield, I'm sure the Hokage would understand."  
"Are you laughing at me?"  
"Not yet," said the red-headed medic. "But soon, if you keep it up."

Kakashi turned fully and realized that there was a smile on her face and he smiled weakly back at her. At least she didn't seem so sad now. For a short while, she would be able to forget Obito and enjoy his company. He could never fill in for Obito, but he would try his hardest to make her happy.

_It's my promise. I will always feel indebted to them... and I don't feel worthy to be with her... Maybe I won't ever be normal... never get a girl like the heroes in Icha Icha... but... if she needs me to be there for her... I always will... I'll never let her go, Obito. I promise._

"So I met another medic the other day," Rin said tentatively. "He seemed nice."  
"He?"  
"Yeah... he... asked me out..." Rin's fingers plucked at her medic's apron nervously. "Do you... do you think I should go?"  
"If it makes you happy," Kakashi said, eyes curved up in a smile, then his eyes quickly narrowed. "And if he causes you trouble, tell him you have a Jounin friend who'll beat him up."  
"Sure," giggled Rin. "I'll really paint you really big and badass."  
"I am badass," Kakashi huffed.  
"You'll grow into it, I'm sure," Rin's cheeks hurt from keeping back the belly laughs that threatened to swamp her.  
"Are you teasing me again?"  
"Oh, Kakashi... you make it so easy... I can't help myself..."  
"Humph."  
"Kakashi?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Why don't you try to go out with someone?"  
"Other than the fact that I'm super busy?"  
"Yes."  
"Well..." Kakashi looked up at the blue sky and white clouds in deep thought. "I think girls are seriously troublesome. I never know what they are thinking... And they laugh at me. A lot. The other day... Gai, Asuma, Genma and Raido were talking about girls... They said that girls like manly men and strong looking ninjas... I'm not like that at all..."  
"Kakashi..."  
"Gai tried to make a bet with me. I ignored him. Asuma told me that looking stuck up isn't good to get a girl. I said I wasn't interested..."  
"Then what happened?"  
"No-nothing." Kakashi glanced away, the skin between his mask and hitae ate flushed pink.  
"Tell me," Rin laid a hand on his arm. "I won't laugh. Promise."  
"They-they made a joke about you and I... and I... got mad and walked away. They called me a lot of names. I wanted to punch Genma out – but I knew Sensei wouldn't be happy... so..."  
"Kakashi... I'm so sorry..."  
"It's not your fault they're immature." Kakashi stumbled over the last word. "They're... good friends most of the time... I think they're mad because I got cool missions with Sensei..." He ended, sounding a bit proud. "I don't care what they think, really. They'll probably say sorry right away."  
"I still think you should try," Rin smiled encouragingly.  
"If you say so," Kakashi sighed.

Nothing more was said. Together they enjoyed the silences, both in their own world wondering what might have been – if things hadn't been so messed up. Kakashi wondered what kind of a girl would be interested in him at all. He thought about his pen pal. Wondered what she would say...

_Maybe I should write to her... When I get the time..._

* * *

"Something up, Kakashi?" Minato asked as he sat down at the dinner table with his young charge and his red-headed vivacious wife. "Bad mission day?"  
"No, not really. Just on a farm with Rin doing chores."  
"Ah... it's nice out in the countryside, or so I heard... the village elders seem bent on locking me into that stuffy conference room."  
"That's what happens when you're the Hokage," Kushino squeezed her husband's shoulder and winked at Kakashi, who turned bright red.

He remembered the day the two had gotten married – it had been last year, in the fall. A lovely traditional ceremony, filled with well-wishers and friends who would follow the new Hokage to their death if need be. Amongst the crowds, Kakashi felt buried – and he suddenly was back at his father's funeral, pressed down on all sides by breathing, watching masses. Jiraiya ruffled his hair then – and Kakashi had twisted around to glare up at the tall man who grinned back unrepentantly. When he looked forward again at the clump of people who stood under the shrine, Kakashi's eye bugged a little at the wink Kushina sent him. Rin, beside him, giggled.

It wasn't the same after all. A celebration of life in the aftermath of war.

"So if it wasn't a mission, was it a girl?"  
"Kakashi has a girl?" Minato asked, blond eyebrows rising. "Since when?"  
"Since never," Kakashi glared at his meal, wanting to stab his food with his chopsticks but deciding instead to squish his rice around in his small ricebowl.  
"I heard from some girls that you had an eye out for some dark-haired beauty," Kushina smiled, shaking her head. "She's got half the class chasing after her – so you gotta show her who's the best, Kakashi! Go get'em!"  
"Sometimes you just have to be honest," Minato agreed. "They don't always know what's in your heart, although many will think they do – ow!"

Kushina mock-glared at her husband, returning to her meal.

"You wanna sleep on the couch?"  
"No, no... I'm just saying..."  
"'They don't always know what's in your heart'... what kind of nonsense is that? Have you been reading Jiraiya's stuff again?"  
"You like it too!"  
"Well... yes... to a certain extent – but some things are just not... possible..."  
"Honesty is important," Minato disagreed. "If I hadn't been honest about my feelings toward you, you'd still think I was a brat."  
"Who says you aren't a brat?"  
"Kushina!"  
"A brat I love," Kushina smiled and leaned forward to kiss her blushing husband.

_Forgotten_, Kakashi watched in fascination as Minato returned to his meal, obviously far away in some kind of marital bliss. _Will I ever have that?_ He wondered, wistfully. _It looks... nice... and Dad always loved Mom... before..._

"So, back to you, Kakashi. Honesty is important."  
"I was honest," Kakashi mumbled.  
"You what? You talked to her?" Kushina leaned forward, excitedly. "Since when? Where? How?"  
"This afternoon. Near the river on that field where the girls like to hang out..."  
"It didn't go well," Minato hazarded.  
"Yeah..."  
"What happened?" Kushina asked softly, glancing at Minato with concern. Minato had told her that underneath his gruff exterior, the small Hatake was incredibly sensitive.  
"She laughed."  
"Oh..."  
"Ouch," Minato winced.  
"I had some flowers... but... I guess... they weren't good enough... I wasn't good enough..."  
"Kakashi – it's not you – it's her!" Kushina suddenly found herself wanting to wring the Genin's neck. "She has no idea what a great person you are!"  
"No, it's okay," sighed the young boy. "I'm small and weird. I get it. And... well... few people like the fact that I'm Jounin and stuff... so... yeah..."  
"Maybe you can talk to your pen pal. She's a girl, right?" Minato decided not to force the boy too much. "She probably could give you some insight into a girl's feelings."  
"Yeah... maybe I should. It's been a while..." Kakashi brightened up. "I'll write it tonight."

An hour later, Minato, watching his young charge struggle through a short letter to his pen pal, shook his head in amazement. The blond Hokage found that Kakashi's respect for his pen pal was unprecedented. Kushina, humming to herself, finished washing up the dishes. Minato joined her after a moment, deciding not to bug Kakashi with his letter writing.

"Kakashi really likes that pen pal. A girl, right? Think it's Kurenai?"  
"No... I don't know..." Minato glanced back at the white-haired boy. "It's strange... but... it helps – perhaps, in the end, as special as he is, his destiny for love is also beyond the norm."  
"Hm... well... He mentioned the other day that he needs to get a new blanket. Can you check to make sure that his landlady fixed the plumbing?"  
"I'm sure Kakashi has talked to her –"  
"Just double-check that she isn't, you know, mistreating the poor boy. If I had my way, he'd be living here, with us."  
"He's independent," Minato drew Kushina back against his chest and sighed. "Like Pakkun, he likes to do things his own way. But I'll check with the landlady to make sure that things are going smoothly."  
"I saw a really nice blanket downtown two days ago..." Kushina let the water run over her dishes before turning to her husband. "Maybe I can drop it off at your office tomorrow before you interrogate Kakashi's landlady. Cheer you up in your office-prison."  
"I would like that. Let's leave Kakashi to it – I know a good seat on our balcony that could do with some company."

* * *

**Dear Sakura,**

**Thinking about your teammate - I know you'll do fine! My sensei told me teamwork is the most powerful thing in the world - next to love. I guess that means with your love AND teamwork, your friend has no chance!**

**He's lucky to have such a nice, courageous, determined girl like you going after him! I'm kinda jealous!**

Here, Kakashi paused, unsure of how to describe his unfortunate brush with the snobby girls who refused to accept his flowers, or his simple 'hello'.

**The other day, I saw this nice looking girl - but when I said 'hello', she just laughed at me and giggled and whispered to her friends. I think she was talking about me.**

**I felt like an idiot. I guess I'm not interesting to girls because I don't know what to give to or even expect from them...**

**Well, I gotta go! Duty calls!**  
**Best of luck!**  
**Yours ever,**  
**Scarecrow**

Carefully sealing the scroll, Kakashi glanced toward the balcony door, which stood open in invitation. He listened to the comforting hum of his sensei's home – the low bass of the old refrigerator, the infrequent clatter of traffic passing under the balcony and windows outside – and the quiet chatter of Kushina and Minato. If he shut his eyes, he could pretend this was home.

_And it is, sort of_, he sighed. _But not my true home_. Staring down at the letter in his hand, he wondered if Sakura would understand. _She probably will... I'm lucky to have good friends like Sensei... Kushina-san... Rin... Sakura..._

* * *

It seemed forever to Kakashi, but several weeks later, he got a long reply from Sakura. For weeks, he had stewed over his letter, vacillating between despair and hope. Would she appreciate his honesty? Would she be laughing at him? Was she friends with Rika? Or would she hate the girls and take his side?

His eyebrows rose at the first line.

**Dear Scarecrow,**

**I'm sorry to hear that some evil bitches hurt your feelings like that. Don't pay attention to them. I think they're callous, evil, superficial beasts who don't know what's good for them. If I was there, I'd have smacked them. People have no right to look down on you.**

Taking heart, the grey-haired ninja read on.

**You're nice, shy, smart and powerful. It's about time people acknowledge you.**

Here, he blushed. _So I'm not weird – or at least... Someone out there besides Sensei and Rin appreciate me... I wonder if Sakura would ever... No... Idiot..._

**But still, it sounds good to me - you're starting to get interested in girls. Finally, you're getting a life. I should be the one who's jealous. Do you have any girl specifically that you like? Do tell!**

_Sakura jealous..._ Kakashi wondered how he felt about that. _Okay, I guess..._

**To be honest, I've dated a bunch of guys around town - but nobody has made my heart jump.**

Kakashi's heart clenched. Sakura's already dating. _Wow... Getting a girl like her is probably next to impossible. She's seriously so mature! If we met, she'd think I was some sort of snotty brat..._ He sighed.

**Although, lately, the boy who I used to crush on - the Uchiha - has seemed dim to me. I feel disloyal - but when I see him - I don't see him as I used to see him in my dreams - a future of him and I together. No. It makes me want to cry - I feel ashamed. I thought that love would last forever - but I see now that life and circumstances are like a furnace that purifies your affections. And the weak ones wither away like straw. But the ones that last forever are like gold. What do you think?**

Rereading the paragraph, Kakashi felt brighter all of a sudden. _So the Uchiha wasn't so important anymore?_ He frowned at himself. Reading this letter made him feel dizzy – one minute feeling like his Sensei had pulled him into an Earth Element trap, the next minute, feeling like he was flying through the trees. Odd.

**At any rate, this means that my goal of getting him back is even clearer, being freed of clouded judgement.**

**Just writing this, I feel better already.**  
**Thanks a lot for listening!**  
**You're the greatest!**  
**Love,**  
**Sakura.**

Kakashi was still smiling over her letter when Minato burst into his small apartment, nearly bouncing off the walls.

"Kakashi – you won't guess what!"  
"What?"  
"You know how Kushina has been kinda happy lately – and has been sick every morning – and she's starting to want to eat more ramen than ever?"  
"Yeah? Is she dying?"  
"No. She's having a baby!"  
"Baby." Kakashi repeated blankly.  
"We're having a baby! I'm so happy! I hope it's a girl – just like her mother!"  
"A baby," Kakashi said softly, trying to imagine what it would look like.  
"Are you okay, Kakashi? You know you will always be welcome, baby or no. You'll have a little brother or sister – or you can be their uncle –"  
"No... I'm just..." Kakashi blinked. "So... that's why she kinda looked a bit... rounder... lately."  
"You noticed it too? I said something and I had to sleep on the couch. Never tell pregnant ladies they are fat, Kakashi."  
"Okay, Sensei."  
"So the baby will be here in six months or so. I'm so excited. If it's a boy, we're going to call it Naruto!"  
"Naruto – after Jiraiya-sensei's character?" Kakashi asked, eyebrow rising a little. "Kushina-san is okay with that?"  
"She loves it! You know how she's always been a gutsy character."  
"Yeah..."  
"Jiraiya-sensei is of course going to be the godfather," Minato went on, getting a bit more sober as the news really settled in. He sat down on Kakashi's bed, recognizing the green and black quilt as Kushina's purchase. "We'll have to get ready... it's going to be difficult for the both of us..."  
"But mostly for Kushina-san, right?" Kakashi said. "I heard from Rin that a girl has to push the baby out hard and it hurts a lot – so..." Kakashi's face turned a shade of green and Minato smiled as the boy struggled with imagining Kushina having a baby. "Is it going to be okay? Rin tells me they yell and scream a lot – and sometimes the baby is hurt and –"  
"Hey, it's going to be okay," Minato smiled. "Everything will be fine."

Kakashi nodded, a little disbelievingly. That's what everyone said. It never turned out that way.

* * *

It was happening too fast – Kakashi felt as though every second was lasting an hour – and the waiting. It was killing him. In his back pocket, he could feel the weight of his unfinished letter to Sakura. Over the months, he had sent short notes and they had exchanged small communiques about daily life – but now, the feeling of doomsday was on him – and the words of Minato came back to him.

_"Everything will be fine."_

_He had to say that_, sighed Kakashi. _We're doomed._

Of course, hearing Kushina's cries as she birthed her baby boy, didn't help matters either. The small cabin was surrounded by ANBU. Kakashi's role was small – stay close by to run errands for the Hokage. For the Hokage who was inside with the medics keeping the seal on Kushina. Kakashi wasn't sure what he was more surprised about – the fact that Kushina was apparently a Jinchuuriki – or the fact that Minato had married her regardless. Everyone knew that Jinchuuriki were just time bombs waiting to happen.

_But Kushina is different_, he remembered her small gifts. The green and black blanket with the shuriken pattern he always loved to curl up under. _She loves Minato. She's a person... Why can't people see her that way? I guess... the power of the Jinchuuriki is so great._

A medic emerged from cabin. Everyone stiffened to attention. Waving Kakashi over, the medic laid a scroll in the young Jounin's hand.

"Send this to the elders," the medic nodded. "A message from the Hokage. He said you were to return home and wait for his signal."

Kakashi nodded, knowing better to argue. When he returned home, he glanced up at the dark sky uneasily. The hard stares of the village elders weren't as ominous as the clouds – and he had a feeling – more than ever that there were things stirring that he could only guess up.

_It sucks to be a kid_, he thought glumly. _I'm fourteen – but they still treat me like I'm a child._

Taking out his letter, Kakashi contented himself with writing a bit more.

**Dear Sakura,**

**Thanks for the encouragement! I'll try to be more self-confident. And you're right - there's a girl who I've lost my heart to - but I can't tell you - you'll laugh. But she's strong, courageous, determined, beautiful, honest and selfless. And she's got an inner fire in her - worthy of Leaf kunoichi.**

**You know... Life is a book of images, you know, memories and ideas and they all pile up until you start to forget the beginning - and sometimes you forget where you wanted to go - or what you should do. That's what my grandfather once told me and - well - HIM... you know... Father said... It's more important, then, to be able to stop and look back - maybe you are missing important facts. It's okay to second guess your loves - because life is so changeable - every page is a new start and when you turn the pages back, you can see the changes that you never noticed before.**

As he finished the last line, he paused to think over the day. It had began so normally – with slow waking up, a shower, a quick bite to eat of some left-overs from Kushina's last dinner... and then a visit to the Shrine to say hi to Obito – then double-checking the Mission office. No missions... hanging out in the Jounin lounge to pick up gossip before they noticed him there... and then finding Rin to eat lunch. And then, Minato had rushed in, asking for Kakashi and Rin to get to the hospital...

Rin, as a medic, had been called to help the medic staff with the birth. Kakashi wasn't allowed inside though. Part of him had been relieved, part of him worried twice as much. Then, the cabin was surrounded by ANBU. Which wasn't very encouraging.

_It was just a baby, right?_

Sighing, Kakashi tore his thoughts away from the mystery and continued on.

**At any rate, things have gotten really hectic around here what with my Sensei's wife having her baby and all. I guess, there's some hush-hush stuff about it - I can't really say much - but I think Sensei is really worried - so he's not leaving her side. He says I'm supposed to wait for his signal - but what if I can't get to his side in time? What if something goes wrong? I have a really bad feeling... He said everything would turn out just fine - but you know how things go.**

**Besides, there have been rumours that I heard around town about different factions starting up. What if people start to fight each other in Konoha? I'm not even sure if I know which side is the right one. I guess I'll just stick by Sensei.**

Kakashi nodded, thinking about the grumblings among the Uchiha, the proud looks of the Hyuuga which always inflamed the poorer ninjas... and even his own clan, once a great buffer between the great bloodlines – now decimated. Depressing... Kakashi's eyes drifted closed – and before his head hit the quickly drying letter, a sonic boom, a harsh loud growl and a burst of wind rattled all of the windows.

Jerking awake, Kakashi peered out of the window. Above the tree line to the north, a spread of fire was rising – like the sun. Except it wasn't the sun.  
**  
**_Sensei..._

Glancing down at the letter, Kakashi scrawled even quicker an explanation and a brief goodbye.

**Oh! I gotta go! Something is happening outside! The sky just turned deep red! It's like the sun came up or something! Gotta run!**

**Love,  
Scarecrow**

Stuffing the scroll into his pocket, he headed to the Mission Office. _On the way, I can drop the letter off... And then get to the office. I'm sure they have news. They will know what was going on. I hope..._

* * *

Several weeks later, Kakashi found himself alone in his apartment again. This time, the silence weighed heavy. But there was nowhere else to go. The small warm home of his Sensei was now empty. Comforting chatter, loving teasing, wild jokes...

_All gone_, he thought numbly. As if on autopilot, he drew an empty page toward him with his favourite pen and ink pot. He stared at the letter's opening blankly for several seconds. It had seemed to write itself.

**Dear Sakura, **

Then, he added a few more lines, trying to sort out his feelings. Part of him wondered if the girl had been old enough to be allowed to fight – like Ibiki... or had been disallowed from fighting like Iruka and the rest of the gang.

_Iruka... the class idiot was apparently an orphan now..._ Kakashi sighed. _Join the club. Or maybe..._

He remembered Rin's still face – a victim of the Nine-Tails. A victim of Madara's ambition. _In the end, Obito's family had killed the one Obito died for. Ironic..._

For several minutes, he found himself unable to write. Part of him wanted to lay his head down on the table and cry. _But it won't do any good_, he thought. So he kept writing.

**You could say things went good and they went bad. Don't they always? Well... I won't be writing for awhile. I've decided to join ANBU. It's best this way. Don't worry. I can take care of myself. People are talking alot about it again - you know the whole "he's too young thing." Well... I don't care... I'm going to work hard - and I will get in. I'm guessing it might take me a year or so - but I will succeed. When I'm sixteen I think I could pass their test, forget what other people say... they said the same thing when I graduated as a Genin... as a Chuunin... as a Jounin... Whatever. **

**I really can't talk about what happened yet - it seems so unreal. It's been several weeks and still...  
Sensei's dead.  
Rin's dead.**

He shivered at the memory of their cold hands when he said goodbye. At the impersonal photos on the mass shrine. The slick feel of the chrysanthemum's green leaves between his fingers. The sad weight of the Sandaime's gaze on the crowd.

**And I'm so alone - it's so cold here - I guess, it's cold wherever you are not - That doesn't make much sense... does it?**

**I miss you tons,**  
**Scarecrow**

_What will she think about my decision?_ He wondered. It seemed so long since anyone would care about his life. Sensei and Rin were gone. Gone to where his father and mother rested... no one would miss him if he went into ANBU. _Well... except for Gai, maybe... but... he'll get over it. He has the others._

Uncertainly, he added a postscript, hoping for the best. _Maybe she will understand..._

**p.s. I'm sorry if I've disappointed you. I'm sorry we could never meet.**

* * *

Four months later, he returned from another long week of training and a B-Rank mission to find a stack of letters in his mail box. There were the usual bills which he made a mental note to pay, a few flyers for old sales and a new barbeque restaurant... and a familiar letter.

_Sakura_. Quickly fumbling at the door, Kakashi threw the stack on the desk and sat back on his bed to enjoy her letter.

_She replied. So... she's not mad at me or anything..._

**Dear Scarecrow,**

**I'm so sorry for not answering you. But for some reason your first letter came with your second one. I guess the address wasn't clear... I gotta talk to the post office about it.**

_It was probably my handwriting_, Kakashi grimaced, remembering how rushed he had been writing the address on the envelope. _That day... was... Nevermind..._

**At any rate, it sounds like things have gotten bad for you... I'm sorry to hear about the death of Rin and your Sensei. I don't know what to say.**

_At least she isn't saying stupid platitudes about life after death or what Kurenai said about them watching over us..._

**I worry everyday for my sensei and Naruto - and even Sasuke. People are dying here on the front lines - they're coming back from missions hurt and unable to move. People have burnt themselves out - with weird emotional disorders and things from genjutsu attacks and things like that.**

Kakashi reread the letter and frowned. _People dying? Front lines? What... Is Sakura crazy? Impossible... she's always been level-headed... is she from a different country? I should ask Ibiki – he always knows what's going on..._ The puzzled ninja read on.

**It's bad. But you know - I know that it's a fact of life. It's the shinobi's life - we fight - we risk it all for what we've got - companionship, love - friendship - don't you think? What you fight for is what your teammates showed you?**

**Friendship.**

**At any rate, on the front lines here, things are crazy... but we'll see... I hope I can make everyone proud - especially you! I hope you come out of ANBU - to meet me. You know I'd never turn you away.**

**Wish me luck,**  
**Ever loving,**  
**Sakura.**

_So she's not mad at all. Wow. Sakura is amazing... Except for the part where she's almost in another world altogether..._ Kakashi laid her most recent letter with all of the other letters into his special chest (carved for his father by his grandfather) – which also held a few photographs of his parents, Obito's goggles, his Sensei's kunai and Rin's medpack. And Sakura's dried flowers.

_This is seriously getting weird. But I don't want to accuse her of being crazy. Girls are sensitive... so maybe I can try to gain some clues from her letters._

* * *

Time passed on for Kakashi, each season taking its turn and changing almost effortlessly – inevitable as life itself. Kakashi trained, took the test and at the early age of sixteen, ignoring the whispers, joined ANBU. Throughout it all, the letters passed – and with each new letter, Kakashi found himself looking forward to each letter – a reminder of another life of happiness outside the dark world of ANBU.

He never discussed his work in detail, of course, but there was something therapeutic about sharing his feelings with Sakura. In a world of shadows, chaos and treachery, her bright rays of hope seemed like the North Star in the deep night. Considering the last letter she had sent to him, Kakashi looked around his small team.

The mission had ended successfully and they were returning home. It was a good feeling. Although the heavy rain was a bit dampening. Even though it was the mid-afternoon, thanks to the downpour, the team had settled in the shelter of a cave. Nakana had decided to rest and see if they could wait out the heaviest part of the storm. Kakashi wasn't complaining. He had a lot to think about.

"A success," his junior said softly, behind a cat mask.  
"Yes," Kakashi nodded, leaning back, closing his eyes – trying not to see the dead woman impaled on his Raikiri.  
"Some jutsu you had there."  
"Hm." The now reknown "Copy Nin" sighed, wishing his teammate would go bury himself.  
"How many elements do you have under your belt now?"

Kakashi turned to the brown-haired nin.

"What's your name again?"  
"Yamato. I've been looking forward to meeting you, senpai. I heard you're heading to be the top of the field. It's an honour to work in the same team as you!"  
"Well, you know what they say about teams."  
"Eh?"  
"The team is only as strong as its weakest member," Kakashi shrugged. "That's what my Sensei once told me."  
"He sounds like a smart man."  
"He was."  
"I'm pleased to work with you," Yamato tipped his mask in a slight bow. "I hope we can work well together in the future."  
"Yes," Kakashi replied quietly. "While we have time."

Ignoring Yamato's obvious confusion, Kakashi slipped away to watch the rain fall, taking comfort in the continuous sound. When he got home, he stretched, feeling more exhausted than ever. Debriefing had seemed to go on and on – more or less because of the newbie, Yamato. Breaking in newbies always took time.

_Dinner. That's what I need._ Slipping into civilian clothing, Kakashi grabbed an umbrella and sprinted out into the rain – to his Sensei's favourite ramen shop. _A bit of warm miso soup will hit the spot_, he thought. _Warm soup, a cup of tea and writing a letter to Sakura... Sounds like a great night to me._

When he returned home that night, Kakahi felt more depressed than ever. Instead of writing a letter that suddenly seemed so precious, he shut off the light and laid down on his bed. Sleep came slowly, and he woke up too early.

It was waiting for him. The blank sheet. The bad news yet unwritten. Shoulders slumped, he began to write. This wasn't going to be easy...

**Dear Sakura,**

**Days like yesterday seem insane. I can't go into details - but it was rather hard... What makes it worse, is that I hear tell the Academy is going to be cutting back. The postbox will be set aside for a while... A teacher told me they are stopping in a month or so. I guess it's new management at the Academy. I don't know what to say - except that I'm sorry.**

**I'm sorry that I wasn't able to go where you wanted me to go. Or to be there all the time for you. You've done so much for me - I feel like - I dunno... a sponger? Listening to your funny letters, I find sometimes that I can laugh again. I guess... I'm getting rusty... I'm sorry.**

**It's you that I'll miss the most... what do you call that? What is love? Do you know? I think I've forgotten.**

**Yours,**  
**Even in separation,**  
**Scarecrow**

Rubbing Obito's eye, which was threatening to water up, Kakashi stifled a sob, pulled his knees up to his chest and huddled on his desk chair.

_Will things ever be right again?_

* * *

Within a week, he got a reply back. It seemed to be a little blurred – and the words turned his bones to fire – his heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest.

**Dearest Scarecrow, **

**Love. That's so hard - to say what it is and isn't.**

**But, you know. I think now, I know what love is. Love is worry. It's worrying about that person. Worrying about whether he's going to live the next day or not. Love is waiting. Waiting for him to come back from a foray and wondering if this is the last time you'll link arms with him - if this is the last time you'll lay your healing hands on him and close his wounds... Love is steadfast - and enduring - kind of like how the sea is always there, washing up against the shore. And that's why memories are important - because in those dark days - when everything seems like you've lost - those warm memories are there as a light to guide you -**

**To give you hope. Because you know, love can't die. And love is speaking out - that's what it is, really. It's action personifying feelings. When you tell them - what you really feel.**

_Just like Sensei said_, Kakashi gasped, remembering Minato's words. _Honesty. Being honest. Even if it's hard. Even if you will get laughed at... Could I ever be that brave?_

**I want to tell him, that, you know. I've been feeling these things for my sensei... well... he's my ex-sensei, now, you've probably heard of him - he's famous in many countries – so – will he like a girl like me? I don't know if I should say anything... see...**

Kakashi's heart plummeted. _She's in love with her Sensei! I mean, ex-Sensei! But still... I have no luck! Just when she got over that Uchiha too!_

**Love is hard - because it has a mind of its own. I love my sensei. But I also love you. I wish I could meet you. Sasuke doesn't mean anything to me anymore... but you...**

**I'm worried - that one day you're heart will be so dark, it will forget me - that one day, you'll throw your life away on an un-ranked mission. I'm waiting - I'll just out and out admit that I've been looking for you - I'm waiting for you to come to me. Seriously. And this kind of love is steadfast... and I want to be that warm memory for you - so that you can always hope for something. So that you can fight for something.**

**I don't know how my sensei fits into this but... I have been wanting to say to you - "I love you. Forever. I don't want you to die - because I'm waiting here. I've always been waiting here - and I just didn't know it..."**

**Please come back, leave ANBU! I mean it! As for the post box - I'll find a way for us to meet - someday, somewhere - and remember - I'm waiting for you!**

**I love you forever, no matter what -**

**Sakura**

**p.s. If you don't follow through, I won't get mad at you - I won't abandon you - no. I will HUNT you down and beat you senseless and then drag you home... because - together, we'll make that cold place something warm.**

Kakashi banged his head on his desk several times in an attempt to clear it. But it didn't help – that weird, tingling, happy feeling was sprouting in his chest. He felt like he couldn't breathe.

_Sakura loves me!_ He whispered aloud. "Sakura loves ME!"

He could hear Minato and Kushino laughing at him.

"Of course she does, silly!" Kushina rolled her eyes. "I told you that she's the woman for you!"  
"I was the one that said that!" Minato smiled at his wife and then turned to Kakashi. "Remember what I said about honesty. Take the chance."

Obito and Rin were standing on a green hill, holding hands and smiling at him.

"You go get her," Obito gave him a thumbs up. "It's my turn to take care of Rin now!"  
"Don't be afraid of happiness," Rin's whisper floated away on the wind, buried in the rustling leaves of spring's blossoms.

When Kakashi woke, he knew that the most important letter for him to write was waiting for him. It was now or never.

* * *

**Please review!**

**For reviewers:**

Prescripto13: Had to go back and change LOY's letters because I found another plot hole. *stabs plot to death* I now know the pain of writing time travel fics. Stephen Moffat of Doctor Who fame gets my full appreciation.

Kakashifangirlnumber1000: Thanks! I hope it was a good b-day present! Hope you enjoy the new update as well!

SheWhoHasLostHerMind: I'm glad you are enjoying the Letters duology! It came to me - suddenly - but it's been a pain to write b/c of plot holes. (sigh) But I'm glad you love it! Hope you enjoy the new chappie!

joys: Thanks! Hope you like the new chappie!

sleepdeprived91: Thanks!

QueenxofxTala: Argh! I hate typos in a story. I need a beta. (sigh) Hopefully I'll find time to fix some of them. Until then, I hope you enjoy the new update!

The You Of Yesterday: Thank you for your honest and lengthy review. I have to say that this idea was thought up in an insane moment, and somehow I keep writing it. Already I found so many plotholes you could drive a truck through. (tear) It doesn't help that I leave the fic alone for several months so I've forgotten what I wrote - in cases like these details really do matter. I had to go back and rewrite some Letters of Yesterday to fit this chapter already... and bring it a bit closer to canon of course. (bangs head against wall) What I need is to go back and reread both side by side. . If you find any plotholes in this chappie, let me know! Enjoy!

Hatake Kai: Thanks for your encouragement!


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